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Cinema attendance in Australia between 1994 and 2002

Cinema attendance in Australia between 1994 and 2002 BMK69
The table illustrates the proportion of people going to the cinema in Australia from 1994 to 2002, while the line graph compares the percentage of different age groups attending cinema over 9 years given. It can be seen that, the rate of people going to the movie theater increased, while the number of people who come regularly decreases over the period shown. Overall, from 1994 to 2002, average theater views by age group witnessed a fluctuation, and 14 to 24 year olds were the most frequent cinema visitor.
The table illustrates the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
going to the cinema in Australia from 1994 to 2002, while the line graph compares the percentage of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
age groups attending cinema over 9 years
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
.

It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that, the rate of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
going to the movie theater increased, while the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
regularly
decreases over the period shown.
Overall
, from 1994 to 2002, average theater views by age group witnessed a fluctuation, and 14 to
It seems that hyphens are missing
24 year olds
were the most frequent cinema visitor.
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IELTS academic Cinema attendance in Australia between 1994 and 2002

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
88 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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