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build shopping mall in branfield

build shopping mall in branfield XybAE
The map illustrates the two possible sites for a new shopping complex in the city of Brandfield. Overall, the main difference between two sites is that it can be access by road or rail and their position relative to the housing estate and industrial estate. S1 is located to the north of the city between the residential area and the city centre. Moreover, transportations can easily approach the site because it is surrounded by a river, a road and a railway. On the other hand, S2 was placed at the bottom right of the map. Futhermore, it was in close to the downtown and industrial estate of Branfield. In addition, S2 was near the main road and railway but it is relatively far away from the housing area. In conclusion, both sites have a main road that near and passes through S1 and S2, lead to the customers can access to either location. Additionally, there is large Golf Course and a park to the west of Brandfield.
The map illustrates the two possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
for a new shopping complex in the city of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Brandfield
.

Overall
, the main difference between two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
is that it can be access by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
or rail and their position relative to the housing estate and industrial estate.

S1
is located
to the north of the city between the residential area and the city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
.
Moreover
, transportations can
easily
approach the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
is surrounded
by a river, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
and a railway.

On the other hand
, S2
was placed
at the bottom right of the map.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Futhermore
, it was in close to the downtown and industrial estate of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Branfield
.
In addition
, S2 was near the main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
and railway
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
relatively
far away from the housing area.

In conclusion
, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
have a main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
that near and passes through S1 and S2, lead to the customers can access to either location.
Additionally
, there is large Golf Course and a park to the west of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Brandfield
.

IELTS academic build shopping mall in branfield

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
167 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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