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Bar chart of men and women pursuing education in Britain.

Bar chart of men and women pursuing education in Britain. brDNY
The bar chart demonstrates the total number (in thousands) of men and women pursuing further studies in Britain, studying full-time as well as part-time. The data is collected over a period of 30 years. Overall, there has been a noticeable increase among men and women for full-time education during the three decades. With regards to part-time education, women superseded men in the number during the period in question. According to the chart, men studying full-time during 1970-71 were accounted for around 100 thousand in Britain. Women, on the other hand, started off with almost half of the number of men during the same year. But, during the span of 30 years, the number of men climbed gradually for full-time education and increased threefold. Meanwhile, women experienced a steep growth of approximately 150 thousand during the first decade, followed by a modest increase which peaked slightly over 200 thousand. On the contrary, part-time education for both men and women began with a comparatively higher number, accounting for 1000 thousand men and just under 800 thousand women. However, the number corresponding to men first slumped but again faced a rise by the end of 1991. Women, o the other side, experienced a dramatic increase by the end of the last period.
The bar chart demonstrates the total
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number
(in thousands) of
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men
and
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women
pursuing
further
studies in Britain, studying full-time
as well
as part-time. The data
is collected
over a period of 30 years.

Overall
, there has been a noticeable increase among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
for full-time
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education
during the three decades.
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
part-time
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education
,
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women
superseded
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men
in the
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number
during the period in question.

According to the chart,
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men
studying full-time during 1970-71
were accounted
for around 100 thousand in Britain.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Women
,
on the other hand
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
off with almost half of the
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number
of
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men
during the same year.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, during the span of 30 years, the
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number
of
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men
climbed
gradually
for full-time
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education
and increased threefold. Meanwhile,
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women
experienced a steep growth of approximately 150 thousand during the
first
decade, followed by a modest increase which peaked
slightly
over 200 thousand.

On the contrary
, part-time
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education
for both
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men
and
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women
began with a
comparatively
higher
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number
, accounting for 1000 thousand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 800 thousand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
.
However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
corresponding to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
first
slumped
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
again faced a rise by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of 1991.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Women
, o the other side, experienced a dramatic increase by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the last period.
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IELTS academic Bar chart of men and women pursuing education in Britain.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
209 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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