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Attendance figure of a stadium in 2017, with prediction for 2020 and 2030

Attendance figure of a stadium in 2017, with prediction for 2020 and 2030 KaYw
The bar chat shows the number of people attending the Grandville stadium in 2017, while also showing the predicted number of attendances in 2019 and 2030, after an improvement project had taken place. In 2017, before the renovation, the number of attendances in the Grandville stadium for theatre events and concerts are relatively, under the 50000 figures. In 2020, a year after the renovation, the number attendances are predicted to rise, almost doubling the number in 2017, both for theatre and concerts. While in 2030, the number are still predicted to rise. For theatre events in Grandville stadium, it is projected to hit almost 50000 people by 2030. And for concerts, it is even a more dramatic increase of attendances, scaling up above 100000 people. The only anomaly that can be found here is for sporting events. We can see in the chart that the increase is not that significant at all. From just under 150000 people in 2017, to about 160000 people in 2030. Overall, the number of attendances is predicted to increase after the stadium improvement project. This prediction applies to theatre, sporting events, and concerts that will take place in the stadium.
The bar chat
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shows
the
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number
of
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people
attending the
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Grandville
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stadium
in 2017, while
also
showing the
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predicted
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number
of
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attendances
in 2019 and 2030, after an improvement project had taken place.

In 2017,
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before
the renovation, the
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number
of
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attendances
in the
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Grandville
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stadium
for
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theatre
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events
and
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concerts
are
relatively
, under the 50000 figures. In 2020, a year after the renovation, the
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number
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attendances
are
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predicted
to rise, almost doubling the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
in 2017, both for
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
and
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concerts
. While in 2030, the
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number
are
still
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predicted
to rise. For
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
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events
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Grandville
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stadium
, it
is projected
to hit almost 50000
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people
by 2030. And for
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concerts
, it is even a more dramatic increase of
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attendances
, scaling up above 100000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

The
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only
anomaly that can
be found
here is for sporting
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events
. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
in the chart that the increase is not that significant at all. From
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just
under 150000
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people
in 2017, to about 160000
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people
in 2030.

Overall
, the
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number
of
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attendances
is
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predicted
to increase after the
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stadium
improvement project. This prediction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
applies to
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
, sporting
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events
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
concerts
that will take place in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stadium
.
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IELTS academic Attendance figure of a stadium in 2017, with prediction for 2020 and 2030

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
195 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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