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As the years go by, technology has gotten more and more advanced.

As the years go by, technology has gotten more and more advanced. There are now self-driving cars, doors that can be opened just by walking near them, moving staircases that carry people between floors, and many more. All of these are developed to make our lives easier. However, people are now questioning if these technologies are making us lazier. People are always looking for ways to make their lives better. That is why many technologies are developed, be it for cooking, socializing, and many more. For example, in the past in order to cook rice, one would have to stand in front of the stove for hours, however since the rice cooker is invented we only need to put some rice and water in it before closing the lid and going off to do other things. Another example is e-money. With this invention, we no longer have to take our wallets as we only need our phones to pay for things. All these inventions do make us more dependent on it. With the right tools, we only need little efforts to get something done. We no longer need to look around for a taxi as with just a click of our fingers, it will come to us. There is also no need to ask around for directions, as inventions like google maps can easily help us get to our destination. Furthermore, when visiting a foreign country, knowing the language is no longer essential because there are technologies that can help us understand the language. To sum it up, I agree that technology is making us more dependent on it. The development of technology has not only weaken our physical skill but also our communication skill.
As the years go by,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has gotten more and more advanced. There are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
self-driving cars, doors that can
be opened
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by walking near them, moving staircases that carry
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
between floors, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. All of these
are developed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
easier.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
questioning if these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
are making us lazier.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are always looking for ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
better.
That is
why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
are developed
, be it for cooking, socializing, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
For example
, in the past in order to cook rice, one would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
stand in front of the stove for hours,
however
since the rice cooker
is invented
we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
rice and water in it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
closing the lid and going off to do other things. Another example is e-money. With this invention, we no longer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take our wallets as we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
our phones to pay for things. All these inventions do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us more dependent on it. With the right tools, we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
efforts to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
something done. We no longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to look around for a taxi as with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a click of our fingers, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to us. There is
also
no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to ask around for directions, as inventions like
Did you mean “Google Maps”?
google maps
can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to our destination.
Furthermore
, when visiting a foreign country, knowing the language is no longer essential
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us understand the language.

To sum it up, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is making us more dependent on it. The development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: “weakened”.
weaken
our physical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
our communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.

IELTS academic As the years go by, technology has gotten more and more advanced.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
285 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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