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advertisements on children have pros and cos

advertisements on children have pros and cos J3YDB
With my point of view, advertisements on children have pros and cos. The positive affect on children is if the advertisements are good, it will have good impact on children. It wil help children gain knowledge about various products or some new life lesson such as eat healthy, help the elderly, how to cross the road, exercise regularly, …But the bad advertisements are appearing much more and have a negative effect on children. First of all is about the chidren’s decision of buying something. Every advertisements are exaggerations and auto send message. If the children see, I think they will click to its and buy without thinking. Secondly, advertisements appear so much when children are studying are watching the lesson can make children spenful and distraction.
With my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have pros and cos. The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
, it will have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. It
Possible spelling mistake found.
wil
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
gain knowledge about various products or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
new life lesson such as eat healthy,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the elderly, how to cross the road, exercise
regularly
, …
Add a space between sentences
But
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
The verb 'appearing' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
are appearing
much more and have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
is about the
Possible spelling mistake found.
chidren
’s decision of buying something.
'Each', 'every', 'either' and 'neither' are used with singular. Did you mean "all"?
Every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "advertisement"?
advertisements
are exaggerations and auto
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
message. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they will click to its and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
without thinking.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
appear
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are studying are watching the lesson can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
Possible spelling mistake found.
spenful
and distraction.

IELTS academic advertisements on children have pros and cos

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
126 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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