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A chart comparison percentage of Canadian donors

A chart comparison percentage of Canadian donors 1oR9A
The bar chart includes information about an investagation made for Canadian donors that includes different ages and different range of perecent between this two aspects. Another important aspect that is mentioned on this investigation is the years 2000 and 2015 as reference for the chart to take the investigation. As we can see in the result of the chart in the firts three groups of ages which are 18 to 24, 25 to 34 and 35 to 49 in the year 2000´s they were at the top of donations, but on the year 2015 the group of the same ages reduce the amount of donations. On the other hand the groups of the ages 50 to 64 and 65 and over in the year 2000 the donate less than the group the year 2015. This two groups donate more quantities. In summary, the reports shows an interesting results on how the elder group of people show more support and we could suppose that is because they have more finantial stability.
The bar chart includes information about an
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investagation
made for Canadian donors that includes
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different
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ages
and
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different
range of
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perecent
between this two aspects. Another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
aspect that
is mentioned
on this investigation is the years 2000 and 2015 as reference for the chart to take the investigation.

As we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
in the result of the chart in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
firts
three
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groups
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
which are 18 to 24, 25 to 34 and 35 to 49 in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
Apostrophes aren't needed for decades: "2000s".
2000´s
they were at the top of donations,
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but
on the
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year
2015 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the amount of donations.
On the other hand
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
50 to 64 and 65 and over in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2000
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'donate' is correct. If 'donate' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the donate
less than the
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group
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2015. This two
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groups
donate more quantities.

In summary, the reports
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shows
an interesting
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "result"?
results
on how the elder
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group
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
more
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
support and
we could suppose
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have more
Possible spelling mistake found.
finantial
stability.
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IELTS academic A chart comparison percentage of Canadian donors

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
170 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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