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Describe a time when you were appreciated for something you did. v.1

Describe a time when you were appreciated for something you did. v. 1
Describe a time when you were appreciated for something you did. You should say: when it was what you did who appreciated you and explain how you felt when you were appreciated for the thing you did. [You will have to talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to think about what you are going to say. You can make some notes to help you if you wish. ]   Model Answer: I try to help out people without seeking any appreciation or any other things in return. And, it is, of course, our human nature to appreciate the help, even though, not all of us show their display their appreciation explicitly. But, today, I would like to talk about a time when someone explicitly appreciated me for my assistance. It happened about a few years ago, and my neighbour, Kim Lee, needed to leave the city for a few days in order to see his ailing grandmother. To introduce Kim, he could easily be considered as one of the nicest neighbours one could ever hope for, and he lived with his family a couple of blocks away from my house in the same neighbourhood. Kim used to own and run his own small super shop which I used to visit almost every other day in order to buy different kinds of stuff. So, we had a very warm relationship with each other. Thus, when he asked me to watch after his house for a few days, I just couldn’t refuse. Kim told me what exactly needed to be done, including picking up the newspapers from his front lawn every morning, helping his employees to open and close his super shop and turning the lights on of his house during the evening.   He also asked me to spend a couple of hours at his house every day, if possible, and keep the “heater” in his house turned on in order to keep his house warm, as it was really cold at that time. Anyway, Kim left the city after giving me the instructions. But, when he came back after visiting his old and seriously ill grandmother, he didn’t forget to thank me with a very big smile on his happy face. Even though I wasn’t exactly looking for any kind of appreciation from my neighbour, I felt really great and useful after his words of appreciation. I also felt that a little token of appreciation for our good deeds, from the people around us, would take our relationship even farther,   a really long way.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Describe
a time when you were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciated
for something you did. You should say: when it was what you did who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciated
you and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
how you felt when you were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciated
for the thing you did. [You will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about what you are going to say. You can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
notes to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you if you wish.
Loose punctuation mark.
]
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Model Answer:

I try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
out
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
without seeking any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciation
or any other things in return. And, it is,
of course
, our human nature to appreciate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
,
even though
, not all of us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their display their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciation
explicitly
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, I would like to talk about a time when someone
explicitly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciated
me for my assistance.

It happened about a few years ago, and my
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbour' is British English.
neighbour
, Kim Lee, needed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the city for a few days in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
his ailing grandmother.

To introduce Kim, he could
easily
be considered
as one of the nicest
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
one could ever hope for, and he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
with his family a couple of blocks away from my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
in the same
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbourhood' is British English.
neighbourhood
. Kim
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
and run his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
super shop which I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to visit almost every other day in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of stuff.
So
, we had a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
warm relationship with each other.
Thus
, when he asked me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
after his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
for a few days, I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
couldn’t refuse.

Kim
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
me what exactly needed to
be done
, including picking up the newspapers from his front lawn every morning, helping his employees to open and close his super shop and turning the lights on of his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
during the evening.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
He
also
asked me to spend a couple of hours at his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
every day, if possible, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the “heater” in his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
turned on in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
warm, as it was
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
at that time.
Anyway
, Kim
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
the city after giving me the instructions.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, when he came back after visiting his
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and
seriously
ill grandmother, he didn’t forget to thank me with a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
smile on his happy face.

Even though
I wasn’t exactly looking for any kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciation
from my
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbour' is British English.
neighbour
, I felt
really
great and useful after his words of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciation
. I
also
felt that a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
token of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
appreciation
for our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
deeds, from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around us, would take our relationship even farther,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
a
really
long way.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
Language is wine upon the lips. – Virginia WoolfInspirational quotes for language learners
Virginia Woolf

IELTS speaking Describe a time when you were appreciated for something you did. v. 1

Speaking
  American English
6 paragraphs
432 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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