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Describe a person who often travels by plane. v.1

Describe a person who often travels by plane. v. 1
Describe a person who often travels by plane. You should say: who this person is what he/she does how you know him/her and explain how frequently he travels by plane and why. [You will have to talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to think about what you are going to say. You can make some notes to help you if you wish. ]   Model Answer: I like to travel whether it is done by train, a bus or a plane. Of course, travelling by aeroplane is always more comfortable and quick, if anybody was to ask me about it. However, I don’t really get much of an opportunity to travel by plane, but I know a person who does. He is none other than my 45 years old neighbour "William Henry". I have known William for more than 10 years, since the time he moved to our neighbourhood, but I have seldom seen him travelling by train or bus when travelling a long distance. In fact, I talked to him for the first time when I was going to pick up one of my friends at the domestic airport in my city. After that, I have seen him travelling by plane at least once a month. Of course, he takes a bus or train when he travels to short distances, but that too is only because no aeroplane flies to those places! Anyway, I have travelled with this neighbour of mine a few times in the last few years or so, and every time I have travelled with him, he has advised me to fly as much as I could in order to save more time. He also told me that the more time I would save, the more money I would be able to make except, of course, he knew it very well that I wasn’t exactly as shrewd of a businessman as he is. Indeed, my neighbour, William Henry, is a very successful businessman, as he is involved in exporting and importing different kinds of products. Besides, he is also the president of our city chamber of commerce, the apex body of all the businesses and industries of my city. Anyway, I think that he frequently travels by plane because he wants to save time as much as he can in order to become more financially successful. Besides, since he has to travel to different places rather frequently, comfort also becomes an issue, and travelling by plane undoubtedly offers the best comfort one could hope for.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Describe
a person who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
. You should say: who this person is what he/she does how
you know
him/her and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
how
frequently
he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
and why. [You will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about what you are going to say. You can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
notes to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you if you wish.
Loose punctuation mark.
]
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Model Answer:

I like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
whether it
is done
by train, a bus or a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
.
Of course
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
by
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplane' is British English.
aeroplane
is always more comfortable and quick, if anybody was to ask me about it.
However
, I don’t
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
much of an opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I know a person who does.

He is none other than my 45 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbour' is British English.
neighbour
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
William Henry
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
. I have known William for more than 10 years, since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to our
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbourhood' is British English.
neighbourhood
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I have seldom
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
him
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
by train or bus when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
a long distance.

In fact, I talked to him for the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
when I was going to pick up one of my friends at the domestic airport in my city. After that, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
him
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
at least once a month.
Of course
, he takes a bus or train when he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
to short distances,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
that too is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
no
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplane' is British English.
aeroplane
flies to those places!

Anyway
, I have travelled with this
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbour' is British English.
neighbour
of mine a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
in the last few years or
so
, and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I have travelled with him, he has advised me to
fly
as much as I could in order to save more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. He
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
me that the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I would save, the more money I would be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
except,
of course
, he knew it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well
that I wasn’t exactly as shrewd of a businessman as he is.

Indeed
, my
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbour' is British English.
neighbour
, William Henry, is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
successful businessman, as he
is involved
in exporting and importing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of products.
Besides
, he is
also
the president of our city chamber of commerce, the apex body of all the businesses and industries of my city.

Anyway
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that he
frequently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he wants to save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
as much as he can in order to become more
financially
successful.
Besides
, since he
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places
rather
frequently
, comfort
also
becomes an issue, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
undoubtedly
offers the best comfort one could hope for.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS speaking Describe a person who often travels by plane. v. 1

Speaking
  American English
7 paragraphs
426 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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