Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

You want to study in abroad and ask some advice your friend who has been living there for a long time

You want to study in abroad and ask some advice your friend who has been living there for a long time ljrVX
Dear Martin, I would appreciate it if you could give me some advice about studying computer science in Korea and I hope you can give some advice. First of all, I would prefer a college in Seoul. I have been studying computer for a couple of month in our city. However, my family is going to work in abroad. After long discussion, we chose Korea. I do not want to stop my studying, although we move to another country. I have decided to continue it there. Since you have living there for over two years, I am quite sure that you will be able to assist me in finding an appropriate institution. Could you send me information about different collages in Seoul? I do not a huge budget so I am looking for a good, yet affordable institution. Also, could you find out what qualification I need, please? I would appreciate it if you could give me your advice as soon as possible Many thanks Scarlet Smith
Dear Martin,

I would appreciate it if you could give me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advice about studying computer science in Korea and I hope you can give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advice.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, I would prefer a college in Seoul. I have been studying computer for
Possible agreement error. The noun month seems to be countable; consider using: "a couple of months".
a couple of month
in our city.
However
, my family is going to work in abroad. After long discussion, we chose Korea. I do not want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
my studying, although we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to another country. I have decided to continue it there. Since you have living there for over two years, I am quite sure that you will be able to assist me in finding an appropriate institution.

Could you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
me information about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
collages in Seoul? I do not a huge budget
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I am looking for a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
,
yet
affordable institution.
Also
, could you find out what qualification I need,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
?

I would appreciate it if you could give me your advice as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
thanks

Scarlet Smith
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS letter You want to study in abroad and ask some advice your friend who has been living there for a long time

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
166 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • You want to study in abroad and ask some advice your friend who has been living there for a long time