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You want to sell your television. You think a friend of yours might like to buy it from you. v.2

You want to sell your television. You think a friend of yours might like to buy it from you. v. 2
Dear Alfred, I hope you are doing great. It's been a while since we have last met. Hope you are enjoying your new job. I am writing today regarding a television set that I want to sell and I think you might be interested to own it. I am excited to tell you that I have been accepted to join the University of Berkshire for the Masters in Business program. Hopefully, I will be leaving for the UK next month. Since I will be living in the UK for the next 3 years, I am hoping to sell all my belongings that I will not be able to take with me. My one such possession is a TV set. It is a 40 inch ‘Sony Smart TV’ with the Android operating system, and it is equipped with Wi-Fi and many other rich features such as the 3D view and the surround sound. I am willing to sell it to you at a cheap price as a token of my gratitude for your loyal friendship. As I will be departing from Lahore on 10th July, I hope you can drop by on 1st July and see the TV to figure out whether you want to buy it or not. Hoping to see you soon. Warm wishes, Sam
Dear Alfred,

I hope you are doing great. It's been a while since we have last met. Hope you are enjoying your new job. I am writing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
regarding a television set that I want to sell and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
you might
be interested
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
it.

I
am excited
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you that I have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the University of Berkshire for the Masters in Business program.
Hopefully
, I will be leaving for the UK
next
month. Since I will be living in the UK for the
next
3 years, I am hoping to sell all my belongings that I will not be able to take with me. My one such possession is a TV set. It is a
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
40 inch
‘Sony Smart TV’ with the Android operating system, and it
is equipped
with Wi-Fi and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other rich features such as the 3D view and the surround sound. I am willing to sell it to you at a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
price as a token of my gratitude for your loyal friendship.

As I will be departing from Lahore on 10th July, I hope you can drop by on 1st July and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the TV to figure out whether you want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
it or not.

Hoping to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Warm wishes,

Sam
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS letter You want to sell your television. You think a friend of yours might like to buy it from you. v. 2

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
215 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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