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You saw an ad telling about an expedition team .you would like to apply as a team member

You saw an ad telling about an expedition team. you would like to apply as a team member 3WjMX
Dear, Sir or MadamI am very interested in your advertisement in today's news on the TV and I should like to apply to be a member of your Expedition team. I am twenty-six years old and obtained a degree as an English teacher at the faculty of the foreign languages at Andijan State University in 2018. I feel I have many of the qualifications and skills needed for this vacancy. At the present I have been working as an English teacher at the department of secondary school for four years. Additionally, I have several sertificates and I participated in language course, computer course, Which means that I am able to work on the computer proggramme and I can speak Russian languages. I am proactive and able to handle several multiple tasks simultaneously. I am currently looking for this position that allow me to develop my skills and experience with team. I am very keen on outdoor activities such as gardening and also I am interested in expeditions. I am easy going, kind and sociable person I can get on well with new people easily and I can adapt new situations very quickly. If you would like me to attend an interview, I would be able to come at any time convenient to you, as my employers have agreed to give time off for this purpose. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Pearlitta Gomes.
Dear, Sir or
Possible spelling mistake found.
MadamI
am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
interested in your advertisement in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's news on the TV and I should like to apply to be a member of your Expedition team. I am twenty-six years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and obtained a degree as an English teacher at the faculty of the foreign languages at
Possible spelling mistake found.
Andijan
State University in 2018. I feel I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the qualifications and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
needed for this vacancy. At the present I have been working as an English teacher at the department of secondary school for four years.
Additionally
, I have several
Possible spelling mistake found.
sertificates
and I participated in language course, computer course, Which means that I am able to work on the computer
Possible spelling mistake found.
proggramme
and I can speak Russian languages. I am proactive and able to handle several multiple tasks
simultaneously
. I am
currently
looking for this position that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to develop my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and experience with team.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
keen on outdoor activities such as gardening and
also
I
am interested
in expeditions.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am easy going, kind and sociable person I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
on well with new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
easily
and I can adapt new situations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
. If you
Consider removing 'would'. (Usually, 'would' does not occur in a conditional clause, unless to make a request or give a polite order.)
would like
me to attend an interview, I would be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
at any time convenient to you, as my employers have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
to give time off for this purpose. I look forward to hearing from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
. Yours
faithfully
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Pearlitta
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gomes
.
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IELTS letter You saw an ad telling about an expedition team. you would like to apply as a team member

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
237 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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