Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

You have seen an advertisement in this week’s magazine that invites suitable candidates to apply for the sales manager position in a company. v.4

You have seen an advertisement in this week’s magazine that invites suitable candidates to apply for the sales manager position in a company. v. 4
Dear Sir or Madam, I have recently noticed an advertisement in the Weekly Times magazine that announces a job vacancy for the position of sales manager in your company. I am writing to offer myself as a deserving candidate for the post. I have been working in Cubical Property and Resource Management as a senior marketing officer for the last three years and my total experience in this field accounts for approximately 6 years. I have completed my B. Com from the University of Leeds with a distinction and then completed M. B. A from Cardiff University. As a commerce major, I started my professional life in the arena of marketing and I truly enjoy this challenging position. I have been in the marketing sector ever after I left university. I am enclosing my curriculum vitae that outlines my academic and professional profile in details for your kind consideration. I am driven by passion, goal and integrity. I will surely be a valuable asset to your company and would like to discuss my candidacy for the post in person. I can be reached at +44 020 6534 anytime you wish. Yours faithfully, Oliver Gill
Dear Sir or Madam,

I have recently noticed an advertisement in the Weekly Times magazine that announces a job vacancy for the position of sales manager in your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. I am writing to offer myself as a deserving candidate for the post.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have been working in Cubical Property and Resource Management as a senior marketing officer for the last three years and my total experience in this field accounts for approximately 6 years.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have completed my B. Com from the University of Leeds with a distinction and then completed M. B. A
Did you mean "form"?
from
Cardiff University. As a commerce major, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
my professional life in the arena of marketing and I
truly
enjoy this challenging position. I have been in the marketing sector ever after I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
university.

I am enclosing my curriculum vitae that outlines my academic and professional profile in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
for your kind consideration.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am driven
by passion, goal and integrity.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
will
surely
be a valuable asset to your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
and would like to discuss my candidacy for the post in person.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
can
be reached
at +44 020 6534 anytime you wish.

Yours
faithfully
,

Oliver Gill
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS letter You have seen an advertisement in this week’s magazine that invites suitable candidates to apply for the sales manager position in a company. v. 4

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
193 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts