Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

You have seen an advertisement in an English newspaper for a job working in the City Museum shop during the holidays. You decide to apply for the job. Write a letter to the director of the Museum. In your letter, introduce yourself explain what experience and special skills you have explain why you are interested in the job

You have seen an advertisement in an English newspaper for a job working in the City Museum shop during the holidays. You decide to apply for the job. Write a letter to the director of the Museum. In your letter, introduce yourself explain what experience and special skills you have explain why you are interested in the job XenY
Dear Sir, I am writing this letter to apply for the job at the City museum shop. My name is Amit Mittal, studying marketing and accounting majors at the Sheridan college in Brampton. While courses are practical itself, I Want to get full-time hands-on experience. Let me explain my situation, I am going to have school holidays from 10th March 2021 to 12th July 2021. During this period, I am keen to work for the shop. My school was full time; however, I was working part-time at car rental. There I learnt about several skills, such as, Time-management, Organising, problem solving, and customer service. I would like to work at your site because of my childhood interest in history. I used to visit ancient buildings with my grandfather. I have home book library about every event happened in old period. When selling the products, I can deliver depth information about it. I hope you consider my letter. Yours sincerely, Amit Mittal
Dear Sir,

I am writing this letter to apply for the job at the City museum shop. My name is Amit
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mittal
, studying marketing and accounting majors at the Sheridan college in Brampton. While courses are practical itself, I Want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
full-time hands-on experience.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my situation, I am going to have school holidays from
The given date is in the future, but the verb is in past tense.
10th March 2021
to 12th July 2021. During this period, I am keen to work for the shop. My school was full time;
however
, I was working part-time at car rental. There I
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
about several
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, such as, Time-management,
Possible spelling mistake. 'Organising' is British English.
Organising
, problem solving, and customer service.

I would like to work at your site
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of my childhood interest in history. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to visit ancient buildings with my grandfather.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have home
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "booked".
book
library about every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
happened in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
period. When selling the products, I can deliver depth information about it.

I hope you consider my letter.

Yours
sincerely
,

Amit
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mittal
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS letter You have seen an advertisement in an English newspaper for a job working in the City Museum shop during the holidays. You decide to apply for the job. Write a letter to the director of the Museum. In your letter, introduce yourself explain what experience and special skills you have explain why you are interested in the job

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
160 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • You have seen an advertisement in an English newspaper for a job working in the City Museum shop during the holidays. You decide to apply for the job. Write a letter to the director of the Museum. In your letter, introduce yourself explain what experience and special skills you have explain why you are interested in the job