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You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and look after their six-year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter 1. Explain why you would like the job 2. Give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ 3. Say how you would spend your free time while you are in Australia

Dear Sir/ Madam, I am writing a letter with the reference to an advertisement that I came across in an Australian magazine "The Times" published on Sunday, 25th May 2021. The ad was about a job for child care while living with the family for six months. My mother owned a childcare center in Pakistan and I grew up witnessing the way she used to manage everything. She is my role model and because of her I started developing interest in the same field. Under her mentorship I learnt ways to deal with the children and my interest grew gradually. I have completed an "Early Childhood Development (ECD)" course recently. I was looking for a suitable job where I could get a chance to translate the knowledge gained during the course into practice. Having said that, I have also experienced the role of helper in a renowned day care named "Australia- Your childcare matters! ". My past experience and relevant certification makes me a potential candidate to be hired for this job. I love reading books and in my spare time I will continue doing the same activity along with exploring the city. I am interested in exploring the historical places which will allow me to learn about the city's culture and people in depth. I am determined to be selected for this job. Looking forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Farida
Dear Sir/ Madam,

I am writing a letter with the reference to an advertisement that I came across in an Australian magazine
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
The Times
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
published on
The date 25th May 2021 is not a Sunday, but a Tuesday.
Sunday, 25th May 2021
. The ad was about a job for child care while living with the family for six months.

My mother
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
a childcare center in Pakistan and I grew up witnessing the way she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to manage everything. She is my role model and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of her I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
developing interest in the same field. Under her mentorship I
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
ways to deal with the children and my interest grew
gradually
.

I have completed an
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Early Childhood Development (
Possible spelling mistake found.
ECD
)
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
course recently. I was looking for a suitable job where I could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance to translate the knowledge gained during the course into practice. Having said that, I have
also
experienced the role of helper in a renowned day care named
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Australia- Your childcare matters!
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
. My
Consider using "experience".
past experience
and relevant certification
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me a potential candidate to
be hired
for this job.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
reading books and in my spare time I will continue doing the same activity along with exploring the city. I
am interested
in exploring the historical places which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to learn about the city's culture and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in depth.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am determined
to
be selected
for this job. Looking forward to hearing from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Yours
faithfully
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Farida

IELTS letter You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and look after their six-year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter 1. Explain why you would like the job 2. Give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ 3. Say how you would spend your free time while you are in Australia

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
233 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and look after their six-year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter 1. Explain why you would like the job 2. Give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ 3. Say how you would spend your free time while you are in Australia