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Write about your job and how

Write about your job and how gbJo7
Hi everyone! Today, I will introduce my job. When I was child, I very like engineer work because I saw they work hard in contruction site and in my house, my father hard to fix it, this is a leakage wall, it is very dangerous so it motivates me to become a engineer when I growing up. Wow, it is really great for me. And now, I can help people everywhere building houes beautiful and cost house not people. Because, when the weather is heavy rain, they will wet after they ill that dangerous. They eat leftover from gargabage. Inside, have many bacteria they don’t know it. I think it very so many so much. I also send my opion in my family. They said me that it is necessy and I should help people.
Hi everyone!
Today
, I will introduce my job. When I was child, I
very
like engineer work
because
I
saw
they work
hard
in
contruction
site and in my
house
, my father
hard
to
fix
it, this is a leakage wall, it is
very
dangerous
so
it motivates me to become
a
engineer when
I growing
up. Wow, it is
really
great for me. And
now
, I can
help
people
everywhere building
houes
beautiful
and cost
house
not
people
.
Because
, when the weather is heavy rain, they will
wet
after they
ill that
dangerous
. They eat leftover from
gargabage
. Inside, have
many
bacteria they don’t know it. I
think
it
very
so
many
so
much. I
also
send
my
opion
in my family. They
said
me that it is
necessy
and I should
help
people
.
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IELTS letter Write about your job and how

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
135 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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