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Write a letter to the department of education to provide financial assistance for a short training course that you want to do in some foreign country. In your letter, you should tell:  what course you want to take  why you want to take the course  how financial assistance can help you.

Write a letter to the department of education to provide financial assistance for a short training course that you want to do in some foreign country. In your letter, you should tell:  what course you want to take  why you want to take the course  how financial assistance can help you. mbJMA
Dear Sir/Madam, My name is Leya Babu and I am a final year student of Management Studies. I am writing this letter to put forward a request for a small financial help. There is a short term course which I would like to opt from Humber University, Canada. This is an advanced course of HR Operations in the Compliance Section. The main objective of taking this course is that it would really help me to handle the compliance category. This would also assist me to grab some great employment opportunities in future. I also believe that this additional course would be an add on to my career. But the major concern here is the financial aspect. The course is provided by limited universities due to which the free bracket is high. Therefore it would be generous of you if you could help me with some monetary assistance. As this will be a great relief to my course fee and will help me to focus on my studies while I am unemployed. Deeply appreciate if you could give me a prompt reply on this matter. Thanking you in anticipation. Yours faithfully, Leya Babu.
Dear Sir/Madam,

My name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Leya
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
Babu and
I am a final year student of Management Studies. I am writing this letter to put forward a request for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
financial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
. There is a short term
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
which I would like to opt from Humber University, Canada. This is an advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
of HR Operations in the Compliance Section.

The main objective of taking this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
is that it would
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
me to handle the compliance category. This would
also
assist me to grab
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
great employment opportunities
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
. I
also
believe that this additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
would be an
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
add on
to my career.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the major concern here is the financial aspect. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
is provided
by limited universities due to which the free bracket is high.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
it would be generous of you if you could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
me with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
monetary assistance. As this will be a great relief to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
fee and will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
me to focus on my studies while I
am unemployed
.

Deeply
appreciate if you could give me a prompt reply on this matter. Thanking you in anticipation.

Yours
faithfully
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Leya
Possible spelling mistake found.
Babu
.
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IELTS letter Write a letter to the department of education to provide financial assistance for a short training course that you want to do in some foreign country. In your letter, you should tell:  what course you want to take  why you want to take the course  how financial assistance can help you.

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
192 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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