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letter to the manager about poor response from the sales representitive

letter to the manager about poor response from the sales representitive Q28yK

Dear Sir/Madam, Greetings of the day. I am writing this letter about the poor response from your sales team. I am John Samuel from 1st street, St. Mary's corner, London. I recently purchased a LED television from your St. Mary's corner branch. When I visited there, your sales person was doing extremely good by explaining all the features and he made me to purchase this high cost television. After purchasing it, your team delivered me the television by next day itself and they installed it on the same day itself. While installing it, we found that the TV is not switching on. So, as per the information from your installation team, we called to the customer care and informed the same. Unfortunately I did not get any proper support from your customer care team. I request you to please rectify my issues as early as possible by appointing a technician or by replacing the TV. Awaiting your swift response on this matter. Thanks in advance Yours sincerely, John Samuel.

Dear Sir/Madam,

Greetings of the day.

I am writing this letter about the poor response from your sales team.

I am John Samuel from 1st street, St. Mary's corner, London. Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
 recently This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquired
purchased
 a LED television from your St. Mary's corner branch. When I visited there, your sales person was doing extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :beneficialproduct
good
 by explaining all the Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).features, and
features and
 he made me to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
purchase
 this high cost television.

After purchasing it, your team delivered me the television by next
 day Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).itself, and
itself and
 they installed it on the same day itself. While installing it, we found that the TV is not switching on. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
So
, as per the information from your installation team, we called to the customer care and informed the same. Unfortunately I did not This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
get
 any proper support from your customer care team.

I request you to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :satisfy
please
 rectify my issues as early as possible by appointing a technician or by replacing the TV. Awaiting your swift response on this matter.

Thanks in advance

Yours sincerely
, John Samuel. 

IELTS letter letter to the manager about poor response from the sales representitive

Letter

American English

7 paragraphs

169 words

6.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
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Include an introduction and conclusion
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Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.5

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 5.5

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.0

Answer all parts of the question
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Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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