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letter to a friend for choosing university

Dear Faizal, Hope you are doing well, It is nice to hear from you after a long time. I am glad to know that you are planing to opt for a higher degree program from The Aga Khan University Hospital. Let me give you the details which will help you to make your decision. So, the Aga Khan University Hospital offers a variety of courses such as Bachelor of science in nursing, MBBS program, Diploma in Nursing program etc. But the course which I select was bachelor of science in Nursing program. It is basically a four year nursing program for people wanted to persue nursing profession in future. Although, University offers diploma in nursing program as well but bachelor of science in Nursing is the preferred course due to its high demand throughout the world. As far as The Aga Khan University is concerened, it is a world wide recognized university and the graduates of this school are now serving at different managemental position. If I tell you the admission criteria, It is completely based on merit and once capabilities. Even though the academic fees are higher but they do give scholarships to the individuals who perform well in first year of the course. Therfore, I recommend this university to you. If you decide to take admission in this institutuion all you have to do is to fill out the admission form and submit it to the concern department. They will then schedule your aptitude and interview accordingly. Looking forward to your positive response. Do let me know if you need further help. Give my regards at your home. Your’s sincerely Shenila Shamsuddin
Dear
Possible spelling mistake found.
Faizal
,

Hope you are doing well, It is nice to hear from you after a long time. I am glad to know that you are planing to opt for a higher degree
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
from The
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aga
Khan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
Hospital.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
me give you the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
your decision.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aga
Khan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
Hospital offers a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
such as Bachelor of science in nursing, MBBS
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
, Diploma in Nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
etc.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
which I select was bachelor of science in Nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
. It is
basically
a
When a number forms part of an adjectival compound, use a hyphen: “four-year”
four year
nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
wanted to
Possible spelling mistake found.
persue
nursing profession
The phrase ‘in future’ is British English. Did you mean: “in the future”?
in future
. Although,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
offers diploma in nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
as well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
bachelor of science in Nursing is the preferred
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
due to its high demand throughout the world.

As far as The
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aga
Khan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
is
Possible spelling mistake found.
concerened
, it is a
The adjective/adverb “worldwide” is spelled as one word.
world wide
recognized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and the graduates of this school are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
serving at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Possible spelling mistake found.
managemental
position. If I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you the admission criteria, It is completely based on merit and once capabilities.
Even though
the academic fees are higher
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they do give scholarships to the individuals who perform well in
first
year of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Therfore
, I recommend this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
to you.

If you decide to take admission in this
Possible spelling mistake found.
institutuion
all you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do is to fill out the admission form and submit it to the concern department. They will then schedule your aptitude and interview
accordingly
.

Looking forward to your
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
response. Do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
me know if you need
further
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
. Give my regards at your home.

The possessive pronoun “Yours” is spelled without an apostrophe.
Your’s
sincerely


Possible spelling mistake found.
Shenila
Possible spelling mistake found.
Shamsuddin
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IELTS letter letter to a friend for choosing university

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
273 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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