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An email to a friend and tell more details about your friend.

An email to a friend and tell more details about your friend. j8Op8
Hi Yuya We haven't seen a long time. What are you doing now? I hope you will happy in your days. The reason, I wrote e-mail to you is I want to talk about my new friend. Last year, we meet in a birthday party. Her name is lia. We are the same age. She is 19 too. She is so cute and has a good-manner. And She is a little popular in university. We became friend are not long but we are so friendly. When I needs a help, she always help me. And she is a rich kid. But we have been a fight. It's just like missunderstanding not a big problem. Now we are fine. I want to talk about her family too. Their family is so rich. Her mother has three Jewelry stores. And Her father is a bussiness man. Her father want Lia to help in his works. But she don't intresting that works. She want to be a designer. And she also good at drawing. About that case, she always have a fight with her father. I hope her father will accept later. So Yuya if we meet in outside, I will introduce you and her. I'm attending English class currently. I want to improve my Eng skill. If I'm bore, it's not ok. So I decided to attend class. And can you recommon any app and YT channel? I think I'm talking too many. If you saw my e-mail, please send reply to me. I want to know your about too. So Have a great day babe girl. See you soon. Your bestie, July
Hi
Possible spelling mistake found.
Yuya


We haven't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a long time. What are you doing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
? I hope you
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
will happy
in your days. The reason, I wrote e-mail to you is I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to talk about my new friend. Last year, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
in a birthday party. Her name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
lia
. We are the same age. She is 19 too. She is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
cute and has a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
-manner. And She is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
popular in university. We became friend are not long
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
friendly. When I
The pronoun 'I' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "need"
needs
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
, she always
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "helps", "helped".
help
me. And she is a rich kid.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
we have been a fight. It's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like
Possible spelling mistake found.
missunderstanding
not a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
problem.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
we are fine.

I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to talk about her family too. Their family is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
rich. Her mother has three Jewelry stores. And Her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
is a
Possible spelling mistake found.
bussiness
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
. Her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
Possible spelling mistake found.
Lia
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in his works.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
she
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "doesn't", "didn't".
don't
Possible spelling mistake found.
intresting
that works. She
The pronoun 'She' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "wants", "wanted".
want
to be a designer. And
It seems that a verb is missing.
she
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at drawing. About that case, she always
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "has", "had".
have
a fight with her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
. I hope her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
will accept later.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
Possible spelling mistake found.
Yuya
if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
in outside, I will introduce you and her.

I'm attending English
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
currently
. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
my Eng
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
. If I'm
Consider using a past participle here: "bored", "born", "borne".
bore
, it's not ok.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I decided to attend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. And can you
Possible spelling mistake found.
recommon
any app and YT channel? I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
I'm talking too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
.

If you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
my e-mail,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
reply to me. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to know your about too.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
Have a great day babe girl.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
See
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Your bestie,

July
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IELTS letter An email to a friend and tell more details about your friend.

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
270 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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