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Accountant position at the Chocolate factory

Accountant position at the Chocolate factory gG723
Dear Mr John I am writing to express my interest in the Accountant position you listed recently on the Chocolate factory. I have reviewed Enterprise's chocolates advertisement web page and am very wondered with your factory's work and you have all the conditions for workers and clients. As well as the service is very well and that you have organized additional classes for the workers. I will be graduating from Mount Olive College in August and am actively seeking a Accountant position. As you will note in the enclosed resume, I have had practical experience in customers and clients service I have compled several accounting courses so far. I have also wonhonorable achievements in many even competions and these helped to increase my organization skills and knowledge of my work. I would like to explore Accountant position with your further. I will be in Tashkent the week of september 9th and I want to meet and talk with you. Should you need additional information, please call me at 91 234 56 78. I look forward to replying from you. SincerelyRukhshona
Dear Mr John I am writing to express my interest in the Accountant position you listed recently on the Chocolate factory. I have reviewed Enterprise's chocolates advertisement web page and am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
wondered with your factory's work and you have all the conditions for workers and clients.
As well
as the service is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well and that you have organized additional classes for the workers. I will be graduating from Mount Olive College in August and am
actively
seeking
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
Accountant position. As you will note in the enclosed resume, I have had practical experience in customers and clients service I have
Possible spelling mistake found.
compled
several accounting courses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
far. I have
also
Possible spelling mistake found.
wonhonorable
achievements in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
even
Possible spelling mistake found.
competions
and these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
to increase my organization
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and knowledge of my work. I would like to explore Accountant position with your
further
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
will be in Tashkent the week of
Possible spelling mistake found.
september
9th and I want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and talk with you. Should you need additional information,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
call me at 91 234 56 78. I look forward to replying from you.
Possible spelling mistake found.
SincerelyRukhshona
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IELTS letter Accountant position at the Chocolate factory

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
179 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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