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You have the opportunity to stay in a country that you have never been to Which country would you like to visit Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice

You have the opportunity to stay in a country that you have never been to Which country would you like to visit Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice Nrnwb
There are more than hundreds of countries in the world and everyone has their favourite country which they always dream of to visit it. In my opinion, if I have the chance to stay in a country that I have never been to I would choose to visit Saudi Arabia. In the following essay I intend to put forth my opinion to support my view. To begin with, Saudi Arabia is very close to my heart because there are holy cities which are significant for Muslims. These cities are the Mecca and Madinah where a grand get together of Muslims occur every year that is called Hajj. People from all over the world gathered there to perform this holy ritual. Last year my friend visited Saudi Arabia so she shared her great experince with me. She have been to Mecca to perform Hajj and it was a magneficient experinced of her life. The place is very organized and clean. People there were helping and gentle, there were no boundries among rich and poor and there was no racism. Therefore, I aslo wanted to perform Hajj so that I could experienced all this Holy spirit by myself. In addition, Saudi Arab is also known for it historical importance where many crucial historical revolutions took place. It was the first place where religion of Islam was first introduce therefore, it is of great importance. Also there are certain places in the country that brings out the holy spirit of Muslims. To exemplify, there is a well known as old as 4000 years where is holy water called zam zam. Also there is Kaabah which is called the House of God which was built thousands years by our prophet. This house of God is famous for two reasons one is of holy importance for the Muslims and second according to science it is the center of the Earth. Consequently, to look all these facts I like to visit that country. In conclusion, I like to visit Saudia Arabia because I have never been there. This is because, it has Holy place Mecca which is of great importance for Muslims, and because it has many histroical places which brings out holy spirit.
There are more than hundreds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in the world and everyone has their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
which they always dream of to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
it. In my opinion, if I have the chance to stay in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
that I have never been to I would choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
Saudi Arabia. In the following essay I intend to put forth my opinion to support my view.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, Saudi Arabia is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
close to my heart
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holy
cities which are significant for Muslims. These cities are the Mecca and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Madinah
where a grand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
together of Muslims occur every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
that
is called
Hajj.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
from all over the world gathered there to perform this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holy
ritual. Last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
my friend visited Saudi Arabia
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
she shared her great
Possible spelling mistake found.
experince
with me. She
The pronoun 'She' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "has", "had".
have
been to Mecca to perform Hajj and it was a
Possible spelling mistake found.
magneficient
Possible spelling mistake found.
experinced
of her life. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
organized and clean.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
there were helping and gentle, there were no
Possible spelling mistake found.
boundries
among rich and poor and there was no racism.
Therefore
, I
Possible spelling mistake found.
aslo
wanted to perform Hajj
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that I could
The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: "experience"
experienced
all this
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Holy spirit
by myself.

In addition
, Saudi Arab is
also
known for it historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
importance
where
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
crucial historical revolutions took
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
. It was the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
where religion of Islam was
first
Consider using a past participle here: "introduced".
introduce
therefore
, it is of great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
importance
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
there are certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
that brings out the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
holy spirit
of Muslims. To exemplify, there is a well known as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
as 4000
It is better to use 'years' with the time-relative pronoun 'when': "years when". (Alternatively, use 'in/on which')
years where
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holy
water called
Possible typo: you repeated a word
zam zam
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
there is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kaabah
which
is called
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
House
of God which
was built
thousands years by our prophet. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
of God is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
for two reasons one is of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
importance
for the Muslims and second according to science it is the center of the Earth.
Consequently
, to look all these facts I like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
that country.

In conclusion
, I like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
Possible spelling mistake found.
Saudia
Arabia
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I have never been there. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, it has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Holy
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "placed".
place
Mecca which is of great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
importance
for Muslims, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
histroical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
which brings out
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
holy spirit
.
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IELTS essay You have the opportunity to stay in a country that you have never been to Which country would you like to visit Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
368 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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