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Write about a problem that occurred at secondary school, high school, college, work or home and how you solved it (in about 100 words).

Write about a problem that occurred at secondary school, high school, college, work or home and how you solved it (in about 100 words). 0E5P3
It can't be denied that high school students in Vietnam are learning many basic subjects such as math, literature, . . etc. However, most aren’t studying fundamental money lessons to help manage their own finance. Therefore, when I was far from home for studying a university, I did not know how to spend money properly. Fortunately, i met a good mentor who taught me about her experience to overcome this problem. First of all, creating a budget is the most important. It includes my own money, my fixed expenses adn my discretionary expenses. All things are listed as detailed to. Secondly, find ways to start saving is necessary. From my budget, i divide into two accounts: chequing for paying bills and savings for earning interest. Finally, stay safe from scams and say no to throw my money around. In conclusion, this is some tips to help me manage money as an university student.
It can't
be denied
that high school students in Vietnam are learning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
basic subjects such as math, literature
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
etc
.
However
, most aren’t studying fundamental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
lessons to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
manage their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
finance.
Therefore
, when I was far from home for studying a university, I did not know how to spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
properly
.
Fortunately
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
met a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
mentor who taught me about her experience to overcome this problem.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, creating a budget is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. It includes my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
expenses
Possible spelling mistake found.
adn
my discretionary expenses. All things
are listed
as detailed to.
Secondly
, find ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
saving is necessary. From my budget,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
divide into two accounts:
Possible spelling mistake found.
chequing
for paying bills and savings for earning interest.
Finally
, stay safe from scams and say no to throw my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
around.
In conclusion
, this is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
tips to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me manage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
as
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
university student.
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IELTS essay Write about a problem that occurred at secondary school, high school, college, work or home and how you solved it (in about 100 words).

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
153 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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