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Write a paragraph about the household chores equally

Write a paragraph about the household chores equally YRA5K
In order to reduce the burden of housework for my mother, so we split the house chores equally. My dad is the strongest person in the house, so his responsible for mending things around the house and does heavy lifting. Next, my Mum tides up the house and does most of the cook of meals. And my brother often takes out the rubbish and cleans the dishes after each meal. About me, i help her mother prepare meals and wash the dishes. In my opinion, when all family members share the housework, it will create a positive atmosphere for the family, reduce the burden so everyone will have more time to relax.
In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the burden of housework for my mother,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we split the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
chores
equally
. My dad is the strongest person in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
his responsible for mending things around the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
and does heavy lifting.
Next
, my Mum tides up the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
and does most of the cook of meals. And my brother
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
takes out the rubbish and cleans the dishes after each meal. About me,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
her mother prepare meals and wash the dishes. In my opinion, when all family members share the housework, it will create a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
atmosphere for the family,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the burden
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
everyone will have more time to relax.
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IELTS essay Write a paragraph about the household chores equally

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
112 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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