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With the increasing number of people in cities most don't know their neighbours and the sense of community e is lost what is causing this how can we will turn it around

With the increasing number of people in cities most don't know their neighbours and the sense of community e is lost what is causing this how can we will turn it around 0AEPG
Of late growing number of people are unaware of their neighbours and losing the community. A see change has been witnessed both the children and elders have lack of social space in locality. The following paragraph would elucidate possible reasons for the problems and purpose a handful of remedial purpose. To commence with the reason, First and foremost busy life in modern period. Due to hectic life they don't have time to interact with neighbours. Even they don't have time to spend with the childrens themselves. Also people have different working shifts. For instance, some people work in night shift and some other people work in day time secondly children don't have time to go outside and play with their neighbours children due to school timing and tuition timing. For the more individuals these days relay on technology so much they prefer to make friend on internet rather than neighbourhood. When they have free period they are busy on the social circle friends like Facebook, YouTube and so on. Undoubtedly every lock has a key similarly some solution should be implemented like government play vital role to resolve this issue. For example construct park so people will be go outside and gather together then parents can automatically talk to each other each other about their life matter. Therefore children would have spare time and they can play with neighbours children last but not the least government can encourage retailers to build moles so people can make their shopping and interact with people To recapitulate, I would like to state that buracracy should put their best foot forward to build parks and malls to improve the communication between neighbours.
Of late growing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are unaware of their
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
and losing the community. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
has
been witnessed
both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and elders have lack of social space in locality. The following paragraph would elucidate possible reasons for the problems and purpose a handful of remedial purpose.

To commence with the reason,
First
and foremost busy life in modern period. Due to hectic life they don't have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to interact with
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
. Even they don't have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend with the
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
themselves.
Also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
working shifts.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
work in night shift and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
work in day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
secondly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
don't have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to go outside and play with their
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
due to school timing and tuition timing. For the more individuals these days relay on technology
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much they prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
friend on internet
rather
than
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbourhood' is British English.
neighbourhood
. When they have free period they are busy on the social circle friends like Facebook, YouTube and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

Undoubtedly
every lock has a key
similarly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solution should
be implemented
like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
play vital role to resolve this issue.
For example
construct park
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will be go outside and gather together then parents can
automatically
talk to
This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only "each other".
each other each other
about their life matter.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would have spare
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
time and
they can play with
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can encourage retailers to build moles
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their shopping and interact with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people


To recapitulate, I would like to state that
Possible spelling mistake found.
buracracy
should put their best foot forward to build parks and malls to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the communication between
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
.
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IELTS essay With the increasing number of people in cities most don't know their neighbours and the sense of community e is lost what is causing this how can we will turn it around

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
278 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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