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With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitats an some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem?

With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitats an some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem? KXyN
It is beyond a shadow of a doubt that the animal population has been negatively impacted not onlybecause of poaching and forest destruction, butalso because of a surge in urbanization, and due to these activities various species of animals are on the brink of extinction. Hence, preventing such animals from extinction is of utmost importance. Several methods need to be used(taken into consideration) to mitigate this issue. One of the fundamental cause, why such wonderful but endangered animals(need to be shielded) require protection is to maintain an equilibrium(balance) between an ecosystem cycle(ecological community). For example, a herbivore (plant-eating) species are dependent on plants for food supply which is later consumed by carnivores, parallel it will balance the life-cycle of natural inhabitants. If any amongst these species are at the risk of extinction then it may disturb the process of holding every natural component together. Hence, it is cruel to destroy these creatures and one should always emphasize preserving their lives instead. To address the underlying(basic) solutions to overcome this problem, firstly strict legal laws should be imposed on committing illegal hunting for human benefits. Several tigers, for instance, are illegally shot for their skins and bones which can be sold to maketomoney. Thus, by adhering to these laws people might feel reluctant to kill them. Secondly, providing them with a natural dwelling in the form of a zoo as a replacement for utilizing their habitation for urban development can reduce the death ratio which is generally caused due to losing their territory. Therefore, replacing the living environment with an artificial wildlife park might help to multiply (increase exponentially) the existing number of animals. To conclude, human beings risk animal survival to fulfill their materialistic requirements. Having said that, attempts to preserve these disappearing species is necessary to run the biological-clock of life and it can be achieved by enforcing certain rules before they vanish from the planet
It is beyond a shadow of a doubt that the
animal
population has been
negatively
impacted not
onlybecause
of poaching and forest destruction,
butalso
because
of a surge in urbanization, and due to these activities various species of
animals
are on the brink of extinction.
Hence
, preventing such
animals
from extinction is of utmost importance. Several methods need to be
used
(taken into consideration) to mitigate this issue.

One of the fundamental cause, why such wonderful
but
endangered animals(need to
be shielded
) require protection is to maintain an equilibrium(balance) between an ecosystem cycle(ecological community).
For example
, a herbivore (plant-eating) species are dependent on plants for food supply which is later consumed by carnivores, parallel it will balance the life-cycle of natural inhabitants. If any amongst these species are at the
risk
of extinction then it may disturb the process of holding every natural component together.
Hence
, it is cruel to
destroy
these creatures and one should always emphasize preserving their
lives
instead
.

To address the underlying(basic) solutions to overcome this problem,
firstly
strict legal laws should
be imposed
on committing illegal hunting for human benefits. Several tigers,
for instance
, are
illegally
shot for their skins and bones which can
be sold
to
maketomoney
.
Thus
, by adhering to these laws
people
might feel reluctant to kill them.
Secondly
, providing them with a natural dwelling in the form of a zoo as a replacement for utilizing their habitation for urban development can
reduce
the death ratio which is
generally
caused due to losing their territory.
Therefore
, replacing the living environment with an artificial wildlife park might
help
to multiply (increase
exponentially
) the existing number of animals.

To conclude
, human beings
risk
animal
survival to fulfill their materialistic requirements. Having said that, attempts to preserve these disappearing species is necessary to run the biological-clock of life and it can
be achieved
by enforcing certain
rules
before
they vanish from the
planet
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IELTS essay With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitats an some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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