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Will hosting sports event will benefit the country?

Will hosting sports event will benefit the country? 56RMA
On the one hand, some people believe that hosting an international sports event can benefit the country, while On the other hand some of them think the perhaps. I agree that hosting a major sports event can be beneficial for the country, however, that doesn't mean that it has no disadvantages. Hosting a major sports event can in several ways be good for the country, whether in the long term or the short ones. To illustrate, raising the profile of the city or the country hosting the event can lead to developing the economic situation in the country, by increasing the number of the tourist of the certain country hence, the economy will grow more and more. Believe it or not, the country can even start marketing for the local brands and products by advertising through the tv or even in the place that the event is hosted by, having people around the world in that place will increase the chance of the local brand to grow up with its name as a result of advertising in the event area. Well, it's quite interesting to host a sports event after all the pros you reed, however that doesn't mean there are no cons for it, for instance, many argue that hosting a sports event can cost a massive amount of money by building a stadium, offering the essential services, etc. As well as the short term use for the stadium that cost a lot of money which seems to be a money waster for some. To conclude, hosting a sports event can gain a lot of benefits, but let's be clear at this point, that country has to be in a good financial situation to be ready for any expenses because not paying a lot of money on the event can lead to not benefit from the event as expected.
On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
an international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
can benefit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, while
On the other hand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the perhaps. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
a major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
can be beneficial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
however
, that doesn't mean that it has no disadvantages.

Hosting a major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
can in several ways be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, whether in the long term or the short ones. To illustrate, raising the profile of the city or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
can lead to developing the economic situation in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, by increasing the number of the tourist of the certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
hence
, the economy will grow more and more.

Believe it or not, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
marketing for the local brands and products by advertising through the
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
or even in the place that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
is hosted
by, having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around the world in that place will increase the chance of the local brand to grow up with its name
as a result
of advertising in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
area.

Well, it's quite interesting to host a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
after all
the pros you reed,
however
that doesn't mean there are no cons for it,
for instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
can cost a massive amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
by building a stadium, offering the essential services, etc.
As well
as the short term
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for the stadium that cost
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
which seems to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
waster for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
can gain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
's be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
at this point, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
financial situation to be ready for any expenses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not paying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
can lead to not benefit from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
.
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IELTS essay Will hosting sports event will benefit the country?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
310 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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