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Whether or not someone achieve their aim is mostly by a question a luck ,to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Whether or not someone achieve their aim is mostly by a question a luck, V07JD
Ambition plays an important role in humans s life to get success. And without goal life is boring. Some people achieve their aim is mostly by a luck. The substantial influence of this trend has been sparked the controversy over the potential impact in recent years. I completely disagree with this statement. It is indeed true that, nowadays, many people who has achieved their goal such as Ratat Tata, Mukesh Ambani, MS Dhoni, A. P. J abadul Kalama and many other people. The first and the foremost reason behind this is that a plethora of people who do hard work to get their aim. For example; MS Dhoni who was formal captain of Indian cricket team. Before he become captain, he did lots of hard work to chase his dream. As also he belong to poor family. So that if all time people are depended on the luck, they not able to do something. Probing ahead, another striking benefit behind this regard is that if people do hard work to achieve their ambition, they can get more knowledge and built their confidence. Secondly, they face many challenges during hard work as a result they become strong. For example; these days, many students are not easily Crack the ielts exam yet, they carry on their hard work as a result all time they learn new English vocabulary and improve their English language very well. Also people learn many things through hard work. In conclusion, people should not depend on luck but they should believe on their hard work.
Ambition plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in humans s life to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
success. And without goal life is boring.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
achieve their aim is
mostly
by a luck. The substantial influence of this trend has
been sparked
the controversy over the potential impact in recent years. I completely disagree with this statement.

It is
indeed
true that, nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
Did you mean "have", "haven"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'people' should be used.
has
achieved their goal such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ratat
Tata, Mukesh
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ambani
, MS
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dhoni
, A. P. J
Possible spelling mistake found.
abadul
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kalama
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The
first
and the foremost reason behind this is that a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their aim.
For example
; MS
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dhoni
who was formal captain of Indian cricket team.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
he become captain, he did lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to chase his dream.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
also
he
The pronoun 'he' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "belongs", "belonged".
belong
to poor family.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that if all time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are depended
on the luck,
Did you mean "they are" or "they were"?
they
not able to do something. Probing ahead, another striking benefit behind this regard is that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to achieve their ambition, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more knowledge and built their confidence.
Secondly
, they face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
challenges during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as a result
they become strong.
For example
; these days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students are not
easily
Crack the
Possible spelling mistake found.
ielts
exam
yet
, they carry on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as a result
all time they learn new English vocabulary and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their English language
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well.
Also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
work.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should not depend on luck
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they should believe on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
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IELTS essay Whether or not someone achieve their aim is mostly by a question a luck,

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
257 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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