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When families have a meal together it is considered social activity. Do you think eating together is important to people in your country?

When families have a meal together it is considered social activity. Do you think eating together is important to people in your country? lrJQ
We are living in the modern world. Today some people cannot provide sufficient time for their family. There is no doubt that having meal together is definitely social activity. This essay will highlight that how much importance of the having meal to gather in my nation. To commence with, India has diverse culture and all people are belonging their different families. Some families had changed with time and some families still following their own rules. They have some restrictions about social activities such as, male and female cannot have meal together. However, they have their own rules. Firstly, parents are ultimate role model for children life. In daily life, we have fixed timing period for our meal such as, breakfast, lunch and dinner. On this time, family member have meal together and discuss their own life. Secondly, having meal together is usually significant time for family because of all members can know about their personal thoughts and opinion. Sometime, this things give positive influence on children life. They can learn some manners, respects and how to take the decision with family. Additionally, Parents can deeply understand their children future and their notions. To put in nutshell, I pen down saying that having meal together with family keeps us active for the future and sometimes it can be become best time in our life. That why has been said that, ‘The family that eats together stayed together’.
We are living in the modern world.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
cannot provide sufficient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for their family.

There is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
together is definitely social activity. This essay will highlight that how

much importance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
to gather in my nation.

To commence with, India has diverse culture and all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
The verb 'belonging' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
are belonging
their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some


families had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
still
following their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
. They have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some


restrictions about social activities such as, male and female cannot have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
together.
However
, they

have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
.
Firstly
, parents are ultimate role model for children life. In daily life, we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed


timing period for our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
such as, breakfast, lunch and dinner. On this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
member have meal

together and discuss their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
life.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
together is
usually
significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of all members can know

about their personal thoughts and opinion. Sometime, this things give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influence on children life.

They can learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
manners, respects and how to take the decision with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
Additionally
, Parents

can
deeply
understand their children future and their notions.

To put in nutshell, I pen down saying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
together with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
us active for the

future and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
it can be
A determiner is probably missing here: "become the best".
become best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in our life. That why has
been said
that, ‘The family

that eats
Adverb repetition. Please, verify.
together stayed together
’.
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IELTS essay When families have a meal together it is considered social activity. Do you think eating together is important to people in your country?

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
236 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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