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When attending university, where is the best place to live? With your parents, in a campus dormitory, or in an apartment in the community? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.2

When attending university, where is the best place to live? With your parents, in a campus dormitory, or in an apartment in the community? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2
Where we live, while we attend the university, has a lot of impacts on our live. When you enter a university, it will be a new environment for you and you will need a lot of supports there. Some students prefer to live with their parents while attending their university. Others prefer to live in dorm or in an apartment near the university. In my view, I prefer to live in a compus dormitory for two important reasons. The main reason is that you will make a new friendship while you are living in a dormitory. When you go to the university, it will not be easy to start new friendship with others there. For instance, I remember when I first entered to my universty in Iraq, in Baghdad college, I didn’t know any body there. I lived in the campus dormitory, and in my room there were three other freshman students. It was a greet opportunity for me to stay and spent time with them. After few weeks, my new roommates become my best friends in the college. We spent time together during the free time between classes and two of them were attending the same classes that I took. As you could see, if I didn’t live in the dorm, I wouldn’t have that opportunity to meet a new friend and I would feel lonely when I go to my classes. Second, when you live in a dorm, you will have less responsibilities. If you live in out of campus apartment, you will need to do a lot of jobs rather than studying as, pay so many bills, buy groucery, cook your food, and clean you apartment. While, when you live in a dorm you won’t need to do all that. For example, I lived in the dorm for four years while I attended my college. I used to eat in the dormitory’s cafteria each day. I didn’t need to cook any thing and I never wash any dishes. Also, I needed to pay only one check per month that cover for rent and eating in my dorm. I was so happy with that because I had a plenty of time to study and never be worry about other responsibilities. From my personal experience I could say that living in a dorm has the least responsibilities between all other choices. In conclusion, I believe that each one has different vision to the better place to live in while attending the university; but I believe that the dormitory is the best one. Not only will you make more friend ship but also you will have less responsibilites. That’s why I encourage student to live in the dorm at least for part of their stay in the university.
Where we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
, while we attend the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
impacts on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
. When you enter a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, it will be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
environment for you and you will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
supports there.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
students prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
with their parents while attending their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. Others prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dorm
or in an apartment near the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. In my view, I prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in a
Possible spelling mistake found.
compus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
for two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
reasons.

The main reason is that you will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friendship while you are living in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
. When you go to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, it will not be easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friendship with others there.
For instance
, I remember when I
first
entered to my
Possible spelling mistake found.
universty
in Iraq, in Baghdad college, I didn’t know
Did you mean "anybody"?
any body
there. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in the campus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
, and in my room there were three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
freshman students. It was
After 'a', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'greet' is correct. If 'greet' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
a greet
opportunity for me to stay and spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with them. After few weeks, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
roommates become my best friends in the college. We spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
together during the free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
between classes and two of them were attending the same classes that I took. As you could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, if I didn’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dorm
, I wouldn’t have that opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friend and I would feel lonely when I go to my classes.

Second, when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dorm
, you will have
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun responsibilities is countable.
less
responsibilities. If you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in out of campus apartment, you will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
jobs
rather
than studying as, pay
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
bills,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
Possible spelling mistake found.
groucery
, cook your food, and clean you apartment. While, when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dorm
you won’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to do all that.
For example
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dorm
for four years while I attended my college. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to eat in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory’s
Possible spelling mistake found.
cafteria
each day. I didn’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to cook
Did you mean "anything"?
any thing
and I never wash any dishes.
Also
, I needed to pay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
per month that cover for rent and eating in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dorm
. I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
happy with that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I had a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to study and
The adverb 'never' is usually put between 'be' and 'worry'.
never be worry
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
responsibilities. From my personal experience I could say that living in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dorm
has the least responsibilities between all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
choices.

In conclusion
, I believe that each one has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
vision to the better place to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in while attending the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
is the best one. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
will you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more friend ship
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
you will have less
Possible spelling mistake found.
responsibilites
. That’s why I encourage student to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dorm
at least for part of their stay in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
We should learn languages because language is the only thing worth knowing even poorly.
Kató Lomb

IELTS essay When attending university, where is the best place to live? With your parents, in a campus dormitory, or in an apartment in the community? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
458 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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