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What's the right age for parents to get their kids a cell phone? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

What's the right age for parents to get their kids a cell phone? KwVAN
There is an ongoing debate that mobile phones must be given to children only when time is ripe. I strongly agree that cell phones must be handed over to a child only at the right age. Firstly, Mobile phones are considered to be distraction and also known to cause distress amongst youngsters. Nowadays, cell phones took over conventional means of recreation, leading to addiction. Moreover, various distractors are available on mobile phones like, video games, social networking applications and pornographic content. Secondly, parents often are in state of dilemma. They want their child to be happy but also want to monitor their activities on mobile phones For instance, a recent interview conducted by local news channel "The Republic" stated that 80% of parents of young kids are afraid of what their kids are up to on mobile phones Distractors available on mobile phones often corrupt tender minds and throw them into deep insatiable well. Young kids in their immature age do not have a sense of morality. They easily get distracted and succumb to wrong deeds Furthermore, these activities negatively affects their academics which ultimately leads to unsuccessful careers. For example, recent survey conducted by "Harvard University" stated that 65% of young students suffer from mobile phone addictions, which resulted in low academic grades. In conclusion, Mobile phones have a lot of distractors and tend to disrupt young minds. Cell phones results in low academic grades and causes unemployment. I strongly believe that mobile phones should be handed over to kids only in the right age, when their moral judgment is developed.
There is an ongoing debate that mobile
phones
must
be
given
to children
only
when time is ripe. I
strongly
agree
that cell
phones
must
be handed
over to a child
only
at the right age.

Firstly
, Mobile
phones
are considered
to be distraction and
also
known to cause distress amongst youngsters. Nowadays, cell
phones
took over conventional means of recreation, leading to addiction.
Moreover
, various
distractors
are available on mobile
phones
like, video games, social networking applications and pornographic content.
Secondly
, parents
often
are in state of dilemma. They want their child to be happy
but
also
want to monitor their activities on mobile
phones
For instance
, a recent interview conducted by local news channel
"
The Republic
"
stated that 80% of parents of
young
kids
are afraid of what their
kids
are up to on mobile
phones


Distractors
available on mobile
phones
often
corrupt tender minds and throw them into deep insatiable well.
Young
kids
in their immature age do not have a sense of morality. They
easily
get
distracted and succumb to
wrong
deeds
Furthermore
, these activities
negatively
affects their academics which
ultimately
leads to unsuccessful careers.
For example
, recent survey conducted by
"
Harvard University
"
stated that 65% of
young
students suffer from mobile
phone
addictions, which resulted in low academic grades.

In conclusion
, Mobile
phones
have
a lot of
distractors
and tend to disrupt
young
minds. Cell
phones
results in low academic grades and causes unemployment. I
strongly
believe that mobile
phones
should
be handed
over to
kids
only
in the right age, when their moral judgment
is developed
.
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IELTS essay What's the right age for parents to get their kids a cell phone?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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