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What are the advantages and disadvantages if getting old

What are the advantages and disadvantages if getting old XGyrA
Getting older is something that we cannot stop. People always make choice go throw so many operations to maintain themselves and look like a young. They spend lots of money on surgeries. But getting older there are many advantages and disadvantages as well. Lets discuss about both sides in this essay. In the whole world no one wants to be look like an older person. As long as people getting older they learn so many things, got to experience and enhance skills. For example, Companies will always hire the more experienced person rather than fresher graduates. More older and experienced person will always give the right advice to their beloved once. Like, A son will always contact his parents if he or she faces any issues with anything. Therefore, Being an older person will always helpful to their family to look after them. On the other hand, people need help once you are old and you don't have enough physical strength to do your own work. Being an elder person will face more physical problem then younger person most of the time. For instance, An older person has to pay medical bills, get extra help from their family members, can't do much by themselves and always need attention or assistance if required. In conclusion, getting old means more experienced person and people always have to think positively. While on the other side there are some positive and negative impact on our lives. Which already explains in this essay.
Getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
is something that we cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
.
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People
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
choice go throw
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
operations to maintain themselves and look like a young. They spend lots of money on surgeries.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
getting
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older
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages and disadvantages
as well
.
Did you mean "Let's" (let's = let us; lets = 3rd person singular of 'let')?
Lets
Did you mean simply "discuss both"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about both
sides in this essay.

In the whole world no one wants to be look like an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
. As long as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
they learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
to experience and enhance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Companies
will always hire the more experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
rather
than fresher graduates. More
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
and experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
will always give the right advice to their beloved once. Like, A son will always contact his parents if he or she faces any issues with anything.
Therefore
, Being an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
will always helpful to their family to look after them.

On the other hand
,
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people
need
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
once you are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and you don't have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
physical strength to do your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
work. Being an elder
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person
will face more physical problem
Did you mean "than"?
then
younger
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person
most of the time.
For instance
, An
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
pay medical bills,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
extra
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
from their family members, can't do much by themselves and always need attention or assistance if required.

In conclusion
, getting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
means more experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
positively
. While on the other side there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
“Which” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Which
already
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
in this essay.
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IELTS essay What are the advantages and disadvantages if getting old

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
248 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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