Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children. DbXj
We cannot deny the fact that computers provide a wider range of teaching possibilities to the children. Teaching on a computer can be more attractive and fun. It is also possible to provide a visual tour of what we are teaching. Along with the attractive way of teaching it also helps them to get used to the technology at a young age. For example, in this current pandemic, computers are the only things that are connecting the children with their studies. May teachers have been conducting classes to their students through online. But such practices can be followed to only to a certain period of time. Staying on a computer for long period of time can effect the health of the child. Children are often prone to eye related problems due to continuously watching the computer screen. Moreover, the more the child spends the time on computer, the less he will have a social life. It will disconnect them from the interacting with their fellow kids. The children will also be deprived from having any physical activities at school or at home. Finally i would say that it is important for the child to have a balanced physical and mental activities through out his life and the use of computers will have an impact on them.
We cannot deny the fact that computers provide a wider range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teaching
possibilities to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Teaching
on a computer can be more attractive and fun. It is
also
possible to provide a visual tour of what we are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teaching
. Along with the attractive way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teaching
it
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to the technology at a young age.
For example
, in this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
pandemic, computers are the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
things that are connecting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
with their studies. May teachers have been conducting classes to their students through online.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
such practices can
be followed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to a certain period of time.

Staying on a computer for long period of time can effect the health of the child.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
prone to eye related problems due to
continuously
watching the computer screen.
Moreover
, the more the child spends the time on computer, the less he will have a social life. It will disconnect them from the interacting with their fellow kids. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will
also
be
The usual collocation for "deprived" is "of" not "". Did you mean "deprived of"?
deprived from
having any physical activities at school or at home.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
Did you mean "I"?
i
would say that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the child to have a balanced physical and mental activities
Did you mean "throughout"?
through out
his life and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of computers will have an impact on them.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
216 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.