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Unemployment remains the biggest challenge to school-leavers in most countries. How far do you agree with this assessment? What other challenges face young people today?

Nowadays it's really hard to get a job, especially for people who had left school. So that some people believe unemployment remains the biggest difficulty for school-leavers in most nations. I agree with this belief and this essay will discuss that. Leaving school can stop us from taking good employment. To begin with, at school, we learn about the basic knowledge for work and get past the job interview. Without studying the basics at school, we will easily be unemployed or have a low-paid job. Moreover, at the present, many companies and organizations won't accept you for a job without at least a high school degree. For instance, due to unemployment, many university graduates apply for simple clerical jobs and that makes the situation for school-leavers even more baffling. However, apart from the lack of employment opportunities, these school leavers, these days, face many other challenges. Lack of affordable housing, treatment, and further education opportunity are some of the few issues they often face. Due to pressure from family, and the need for money to support daily life, they often get involved in crimes. Further, they often fall victim to extremism and scams. Many countries have rising crime rates because of the increasing number of unemployed school leavers. In conclusion, school-leavers' unemployment has reached major proportions and created many issues as it is. Therefore, employers should take the necessary actions to improve the condition. mjj5
Nowadays it's
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
,
especially
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe unemployment remains the biggest difficulty for school-leavers in most nations. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this belief and this essay will discuss that.

Leaving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
us from taking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
employment. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, we learn about the basic knowledge for work and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
past the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
interview. Without studying the basics at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, we will
easily
be unemployed
or have a low-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
Moreover
, at the present,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and organizations won't accept you for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
without at least a high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
degree.
For instance
, due to unemployment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
university graduates apply for simple clerical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the situation for school-leavers even more baffling.

However
, apart from the lack of employment opportunities, these
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
school leavers
, these days, face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other challenges. Lack of affordable housing, treatment, and
further
education opportunity are
If the text is a generality, ‘of the’ is not necessary.
some of the
few issues they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
face. Due to pressure from family, and the need for money to support daily life, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in crimes.
Further
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
fall victim to extremism and scams.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
countries have rising crime rates
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the increasing number of unemployed
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
school leavers
.

In conclusion
, school-leavers' unemployment has reached major proportions and created
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
issues as it is.
Therefore
, employers should take the necessary actions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the condition.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
mjj5
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IELTS essay Unemployment remains the biggest challenge to school-leavers in most countries. How far do you agree with this assessment? What other challenges face young people today?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
234 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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