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Travelling in group with a tour guide is best way to travel do you agree or no

Travelling in group with a tour guide is best way to travel do you agree or no 0aaQ1
There is no doubt that these days people prefer to travel with their family or friends with someone he is expert in tourism, The question is the journey with number of people with a tour guide is better or no. In this essay I am going to discuss my view and draw my personal conclusion. In term of advantages travel with group leaded by good tour guide is more enjoyable thing, the main reason reason given I support this claim is travel with someone how has knowledge, skills and good sense in tourism around the city, would make the journey more entertaining for example as normal when we visit new places sometimes we confused or lost the correct way the guide will is one how will help us to find our direction, in other words a tour guide also will us to arrange our schedule and where should go first to enjoy our time. However the tour guide he would insure the maximal security of the group, additionally he will teach and provide the group members tips and skills to keep themselves safe during urgent situation. In conclusion although travel alone is have a bit of joy but travel with friends or family with good travel instructor, I believe that more interesting and will be amazing than travel alone.
There is no doubt that these days
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
with their family or friends with someone he is expert in tourism, The question is the journey with number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
is better or no. In this essay I am going to discuss my view and draw my personal conclusion. In term of advantages
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
with group leaded by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
is more enjoyable thing, the main
Possible typo: you repeated a word
reason reason
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
I support this claim is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
with someone how has knowledge,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
sense in tourism around the city, would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the journey more entertaining
for example
as normal when we visit new places
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
we confused or lost the correct way the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
will is one how will
In informal texts, 'to' is not necessary. Do you mean "help us find"?
help us to find
our direction,
in other words
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
also
will us to arrange our schedule and where should go
first
to enjoy our time.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
he would insure the maximal security of the group,
additionally
he will teach and provide the group members tips and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
themselves safe during urgent situation.
In conclusion
although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
alone is
Consider using a past participle here: "had".
have
a bit of joy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
with friends or family with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
instructor, I believe that more interesting and will be amazing than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
alone.
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IELTS essay Travelling in group with a tour guide is best way to travel do you agree or no

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
219 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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