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TPO 6 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children v.1

TPO 6 Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children v. 1
In certain demographics of the world, every home is composed by a uniquely constructed household. However, as time goes by, the structure and functions of such are changing. The following are some of the undeniable changes: one, as soon as young adults reach their legal age, they move out from their parents’ home; two, being a single parent is becoming a trend being; ultimately, the elders who used to serve as the best adviser are being sent to home cares. My conviction dictates that the current family-related alterations negatively affect the society. Theoretically, family is the strongest relationship that the world possesses. Although this was proven multiple times during the past generations, today, it is doubtable. Adulthoods opt to live independently even though their decision-making is not yet fully-developed; no doubt, these people are vulnerable to mishaps. Furthermore, people of reproductive ages hesitate to tie the knot before engaging pre-marital sex. It is then inarguable why single parenthood’s rate is escalating. If one looks back on the previous times, every family was composed with both responsible father and mother likewise an offspring who sought their parent's advices. The grandparents, who were certainly respected and considered as the veterans of life, are now being sent in a facility called “The Home for the Aged. ” They used to spend their remaining time with the warmth of their family in the four corners of their respective houses. Clearly, the new generation needs to look back to weigh the importance of family. Cliché may it sound, but the only permanent thing in the world is change. Although in some cases, alterations are necessary, in terms of family roles and structures, pessimistic effects are inevitable. In this regard, the humankind must choose which characteristics need to be retained and continued. The current household situation creates riffle of unwanted effects universally, rising chances of single parenthoods, taking the senior citizens for granted, being an ineffective independent, to name a few. Undeniably, these new family-related changes have to be refashioned and if possible, the people must regain the traditional way. As a denouement, family organization and obligations have varied over time. While changes are inevitable, such must be filtered properly as I am colossally against the recent household-related modifications. Furthermore, at the end of the day, families are the most indispensable groups within a community so they must maintain a great bond.
In certain demographics of the world, every home
is composed
by a
uniquely
constructed household.
However
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
goes by, the structure and functions of such are changing. The following are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
undeniable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
: one, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as young adults reach their legal age, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
out from their parents’ home; two, being a single parent is becoming a trend being;
ultimately
, the elders who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to serve as the best adviser are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to home cares. My conviction dictates that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
family-related alterations
negatively
affect the society.

Theoretically
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is the strongest relationship that the world possesses. Although this
was proven
multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
during the past generations,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
doubtable
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Adulthoods
opt to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
independently
even though
their decision-making is not
yet
fully
-developed; no doubt, these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are vulnerable to mishaps.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of reproductive ages hesitate to tie the knot
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
engaging
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-marital
sex. It is then inarguable why single parenthood’s rate is escalating. If one looks back on the previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
was composed
with both responsible father and mother
likewise
an offspring who sought their parent's advices. The grandparents, who were
certainly
respected and considered as the veterans of life, are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
in a facility called “The Home for the Aged. ” They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to spend their remaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with the warmth of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
in the four corners of their respective
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
.
Clearly
, the new generation needs to look back to weigh the importance of family.

Cliché may it sound,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
permanent thing in the world is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
. Although in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases, alterations are necessary, in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
roles and structures, pessimistic effects are inevitable. In this regard, the humankind
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
choose which characteristics need to
be retained
and continued. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
household situation creates riffle of unwanted effects
universally
, rising chances of single
Possible spelling mistake found.
parenthoods
, taking the senior citizens for granted, being an ineffective independent, to name a few.
Undeniably
, these new family-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be refashioned
and if possible, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
regain the traditional way.

As a
'denouement' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "dénouement"
denouement
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
organization and obligations have varied over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
are inevitable, such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be filtered
properly
as I am
colossally
against the recent household-related modifications.
Furthermore
, at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the day,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
are the most indispensable groups within a community
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
maintain a great bond.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 6 Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
396 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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