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TPO 29 TASK 2Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? To improve the quality of education, universities should spend money on salaries university professors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.2

TPO 29 TASK 2 To improve the quality of education, universities should spend money on salaries university professors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2
Education is one of the most important aspects to have great societies. Many ways can be used to improve the education like building more universities, provide extra resources for students, and give more scholarships. Personally, I believe that increasing professors' salaries is one of the most important ways to enhance the education and that for the following reasons. First, professors have to have a stable and secure financial lifestyle. In some poor countries where the income of professors is low, students tend to bribe their professors with money for success. By this way, some students unfortunately would graduate while they are not efficient and they do not deserve to be graduated. This will impact the society in a bad way. On the other hand, if the professors' income is sufficient enough, they will not be corrupt or take money from students to succeed them. Secondly, when professors do not make enough money from their working in the universities, they will try to work in other secondary jobs. By working in two or more jobs, professors will feel tired and their lives will be hectic and very busy. They will not have enough energy to spend adequate effort explaining subjects to their students. They will not have time to search for different resources to find other ways and strategies to make the explanation of a subject clear and easy to be understood by students. This, however, can be avoided by provide professors with good salaries. Finally, usually people are prone to be more loyal and sincere in their work if they get good wages. Professors will be more enthusiastic and energetic in their jobs when salaries are satisfying. The principle of honor of giving in the same level of taking would be ruled. Thus, professors will try to spend more efforts to provide students with best explanations and sources of research and experiments to have good education. To sum up, it is really necessary to improve professors' salaries to improve education in general. Professors will not need to work in another job, or take money from students to fulfill their basic needs. They will be more faithful to their jobs. All these things and others will reflect in a positive way in the quality of education.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
aspects to have great societies.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
like building more universities, provide extra resources for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, and give more scholarships.
Personally
, I believe that increasing
Possible spelling mistake found.
professors&
#039; salaries is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to enhance the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and that for the following reasons.

First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
have a stable and secure financial lifestyle. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
poor countries where the income of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
is low,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
tend to bribe their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for success. By this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
unfortunately would graduate while they are not
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
efficient and
they do not deserve to
be graduated
. This will impact the society in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, if the
Possible spelling mistake found.
professors&
#039; income is sufficient
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
, they will not be corrupt or take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to succeed them.

Secondly
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
from their working in the universities, they will try to work in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. By working in two or more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
will feel tired and their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
will be hectic and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
busy. They will not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
energy to spend adequate effort explaining subjects to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. They will not have time to search for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
resources to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
and strategies to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the explanation of a subject
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
and easy to
be understood
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. This,
however
, can
be avoided
by provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salaries.

Finally
,
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are prone to be more loyal and sincere in their work if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
wages.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Professors
will be more enthusiastic and energetic in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
when salaries are satisfying. The principle of honor of giving in the same level of taking would
be ruled
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professors
will try to spend more efforts to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
A determiner is probably missing here: "with the best".
with best
explanations and sources of research and experiments to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
education.

To sum up, it is
really
necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
Possible spelling mistake found.
professors&
#039; salaries to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in general
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Professors
will not need to work in another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, or take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to fulfill their basic needs. They will be more faithful to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. All these things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
will reflect in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
in the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 29 TASK 2 To improve the quality of education, universities should spend money on salaries university professors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
375 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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