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Tourism is an excellent way to develop a country, but it can also cause harm. How can countries ensure that tourism benefits the development? v.1

Tourism is an excellent way to develop a country, but it can also cause harm. How can countries ensure that tourism benefits the development? v. 1
Tourism has seen a considerable growth over the last few decades due to the improved standard of living. It is thought that tourism is a significant contributor to the development of a country while opponents claim that tourism may pose many problems to the host country. This essay will examine the upside of travel and suggest some measures to maximize the benefits of this phenomenon. Firstly, the rising tourism has been credited with boosting the local economy. In fact, a massive number of foreign visitors help a destination gain more popularity. Hence, thousands of job opportunities for local inhabitants are generated to meet the need of consumers. For example, the locals may be employed in restaurant, hotels or shopping malls. Moreover, the tax in services and goods imposed on visitors help to increase the turnover of local businesses. Secondly, the booming international travel contributes remarkably to the conservation of national heritages. Particularly, money earned from admission tickets at tourist attractions is allocated to the maintenance of local culture. Without such funding, those historical monuments would be subject to demolition. A number of drastic measures can be taken to reap the benefits of tourism. A way forward is to launch advertising campaign about the importance of historical attractions and heritages. Thus, more and more people are willing to get involved in protecting local cultures. Another solution might be to improve the service system more environmentally friendly, leading to the reduction of air and water pollution. This essay has highlighted the merits of tourism to a country’s development as it helps to rise local economy and conserve historical artefacts. Additionally, solutions government might put forward to mitigate detrimental impacts of tourism. 2.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourism
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a considerable growth over the last few decades due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
standard of living. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is a significant contributor to the development of a country while opponents claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
may pose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems to the host country. This essay will examine the upside of travel and suggest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measures to maximize the benefits of this phenomenon.

Firstly
, the rising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has
been credited
with boosting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
economy. In fact, a massive number of foreign visitors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
a destination gain more popularity.
Hence
, thousands of job opportunities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
inhabitants
are generated
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the need of consumers.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals
may
be employed
in restaurant, hotels or shopping malls.
Moreover
, the tax in services and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
imposed on visitors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to increase the turnover of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
businesses.

Secondly
, the booming international travel contributes
remarkably
to the conservation of national heritages.
Particularly
, money earned from admission tickets at tourist attractions
is allocated
to the maintenance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
culture. Without such funding, those historical monuments would be subject to demolition.

A number of drastic measures can
be taken
to reap the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
. A way forward is to launch advertising campaign about the importance of historical attractions and heritages.
Thus
, more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are willing to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in protecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
cultures. Another solution might be to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the service system more
environmentally
friendly, leading to the reduction of air and water pollution.

This essay has highlighted the merits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
to a country’s development as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to rise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
economy and conserve historical
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
.
Additionally
, solutions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
might put forward to mitigate detrimental impacts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism. 2
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Tourism is an excellent way to develop a country, but it can also cause harm. How can countries ensure that tourism benefits the development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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