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Today, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. Discuss the causes and solutions. v.17

Today, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. Discuss the causes and solutions. v. 17
In today's world competition among people is increased, the race to become upper class from lower level of society gave birth to many numerous problems, " decrease in Quality of life" is also one of them. As everyone know that a coin has two sides. This essay will analyse both the facets of this proposal reaching a logical conclusion. Furthermore, one of the most critical cause of reduction of standard of life is health which is mainly caused by pollution in big urban areas through the large numbers of industries and automotive. Pollution is the main source of various diseases from which people who living in big metropolitan. Secondly, the other often mentioned cause is rising in crime rates in metropolitan for that reason people living in constant and continuous stress and fear which also lead big disease called Hyper tension and stress. For instance, women living in a city like Delhi are afraid to go alone during the night they afraid from thefts. There is always a solution for the problem, firstly to solve the problem of pollution government should create and impose some rules and laws to force people limit the use of vehicles. They should promote the electric bikes for small ride in the city. Government should spread the awareness about the use of cleaner energy. Secondly, dealing with crime is complex, government should look into more deeply to fix this issue by providing people sufficient opportunity and guidance about the consequence of crime. In the conclusion, it is true that the quality of life is diminishing in urban areas. However, there are some recommended solutions. It is hoped that the living standard will increase in cities.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world competition among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
increased, the race to become upper
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
from lower level of society gave birth to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
numerous problems,
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
"
decrease in Quality of life
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
is
also
one of them.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "knows", "knew".
know
that a coin has two sides. This essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
both the facets of this proposal reaching a logical conclusion.

Furthermore
, one of the most critical cause of reduction of standard of life is health which is
mainly
caused by pollution in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
urban areas through the large numbers of industries and automotive. Pollution is the main source of various diseases from which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
metropolitan.
Secondly
, the other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
mentioned cause is rising in crime rates in metropolitan for that reason
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in constant and continuous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and fear which
also
lead
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
disease called Hyper tension and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.
For instance
, women
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a city like Delhi are afraid to go alone during the night they
The usual collocation for "afraid" is "of" not "from". Did you mean "afraid of"?
afraid from
thefts.

There is always a solution for the problem,
firstly
to solve the problem of pollution
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should create and impose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and laws to force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
limit the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of vehicles. They should promote the electric bikes for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
ride in the city.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should spread the awareness about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of cleaner energy.
Secondly
, dealing with crime is complex,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should look into more
deeply
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
this issue by providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
sufficient opportunity and guidance about the consequence of crime.

In the conclusion, it is true that the quality of life is diminishing in urban areas.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
recommended solutions. It
is hoped
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
standard will increase in cities.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Today, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. Discuss the causes and solutions. v. 17

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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