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Today the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not real needs of the society in which they are sold To what extend do you agree?

Today the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not real needs of the society in which they are sold gopL
Incremental sales of familiar consumer products point towards the strength of advertising rather than the actual requirement of the society. In my opinion, people are carried away by the advert which results in increased sales of buyer goods. On the one hand, people buy products based on the information that they gather from an advert and overlook the usefulness of the product. Due to this trend, companies are selling more and more. In such cases, a massive publicity campaign drives the selling power. For example, sales of a protein powder increased exponentially during the last 3 years, from 2016 to 2019, as a result of the massive advertising program acted by Tiger woods. People bought the product because it was endorsed by a famous celebrity and never reviewed the usefulness of the commodity before purchasing. On the other hand, certain buyer goods have increased sales as they are the necessity of humans. These materials do not have any kind of publicity. Rather, People buy the products as it is a daily requirement, and nobody needs to drive the people into buying it. Toothpaste, for instance, had an amazing increase in sales despite no advertising. Thisshows that people review and buy their products after the careful distinction between need and luxury. In conclusion, it can be seen that people are, primarily, driven by advertisements which result in increased sales of consumer goods because a celebrity has endorsed the commodity or information gathered directly from the advert. However, there are a few people who buy goods only based on need and do not rely on any sorts of advertisement.
Incremental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of familiar consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
point towards the strength of advertising
rather
than the actual requirement of the society. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are carried
away by the advert which results in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of buyer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
based on the information that they gather from an advert and overlook the usefulness of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. Due to this trend,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are selling more and more. In such cases, a massive publicity campaign drives the selling power.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of a protein powder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
exponentially
during the last 3 years, from 2016 to 2019,

as a result
of the massive advertising program acted by
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Tiger woods
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
was endorsed
by a
Consider using "celebrity".
famous celebrity
and never reviewed the usefulness of the commodity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
purchasing.

On the other hand
, certain buyer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
as they are the necessity of humans. These materials do not have any kind of publicity.
Rather
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
as it is a daily requirement, and nobody needs to drive the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
into buying it. Toothpaste,
for instance
, had an amazing increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
despite no advertising.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Thisshows
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
review and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
after the careful distinction between need and luxury.

In conclusion
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are,
primarily
, driven by advertisements which result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of consumer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a celebrity has endorsed the commodity or information gathered
directly
from the advert.

However
, there are a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
based on need and do not rely on any sorts of advertisement.
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IELTS essay Today the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not real needs of the society in which they are sold

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
267 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Today the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not real needs of the society in which they are sold To what extend do you agree?