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Throughout education, boys often play sports for longer and more often than girls. Why do you think this is? Do you think this should be changed?

Throughout education, boys often play sports for longer and more often than girls. Why do you think this is? Do you think this should be changed? m5gk1
During student life, mostly boys play sports for longer duration as compared to the girls. Throughout this essay, I will explore the reasons why do boys often get more opportunities for sports as compared to the girls and if it could be considered a positive thing. Firstly, I will consider why this is a noticeable trend in many educational establishments. Secondly, I will discuss if this could be changed in the future. To begin with, there are plethora of reasons why do boys get more time to play as compared to the girls in educational institutions. In my opinion, there are many sport teams available for boys as compared to the girls or girls are less encouraged to play because of the social stigma. For example, in schools girls are only pushed to play some limited games like badminton, whereas boys have plenty of options to play like cricket, football, and many more. Furthermore, girls are also forced by their parents to opt for traditional gender based subjects like science and arts. Consequently, it prevents girls from taking part in extracurricular activities leading to loss of interest in sports. Equal opportunities should be given to everyone irrespective of their gender. In my opinion, there are many girls who would love to play more sports from young age but found it difficult to join sports team of their choice and desire. For this reason girls are left with little choices but to continue studies in more traditional academic subjects. Another point to add is that sports are excellent for our health and well-being. Girls and boys both can benefit from regular exercise as well as gaining social skills and teamwork. In conclusion, boys are seems to have given many more opportunities as compared to girls in sports, but girls should also have the equal opportunities.
During student life,
mostly
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boys
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
for longer duration as compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
. Throughout this essay, I will explore the reasons why do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more
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opportunities
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
as compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
and if it could
be considered
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
thing.
Firstly
, I will consider why this is a noticeable trend in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
educational establishments.
Secondly
, I will discuss if this could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in the future.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are plethora of reasons why do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
as compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
in educational institutions. In my opinion, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
teams available for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
as compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
are less encouraged to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the social stigma.
For example
, in schools
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
pushed to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
limited games like badminton, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of options to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
like cricket, football, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
are
also
forced by their parents to opt for traditional gender based subjects like science and arts.
Consequently
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
from taking part in extracurricular activities leading to loss of interest in sports.

Equal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to everyone irrespective of their gender. In my opinion, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
who would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
from young age
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
found it difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
team of their choice and desire.
For this reason
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
choices
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to continue studies in more traditional academic subjects. Another point to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are excellent for our health and well-being.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Girls
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
both can benefit from regular exercise
Probable usage error. Use "and" after 'both'.
as well as
gaining social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and teamwork.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
are seems to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
should
also
have the equal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
.
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IELTS essay Throughout education, boys often play sports for longer and more often than girls. Why do you think this is? Do you think this should be changed?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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