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This days, more and more meetings and business trainings are taking online. Do the advantages of this change outweigh the disadvantages.

Business is such a platform that not only provides an opportunity for customers to buy their belongings but also is a wide field of an employment opportunities. Anyway due to the circumstances that couldn’t help them to meet in person, the advancement in technology kept them on a track, so i am going to explore my own standpoints in the statement. With the very recent advancement in technologies, it obtained new kinds of application which helps in connecting people such as Skype, Zoom meetings, and so many other solicitation that simply supports people especially far away from each other or in an occurrence of some undeniable circumstances. For instance the pandemic of COVID-19 actually changed our livelihood unlike the life once we lived before, the major example could be the start of lockdown which has a big impact on the daily lives of people around the globe specifically in the business industry leading to some extend loss. However the internet played an immense role in keeping the employers intact and active being able to work online from home despite in the fellowship or unity, it allowed them to operate profoundly. So to be honest, business meetings and trainings online did not affect in any sort of complications in fact given a chance to carry on with their day to day tasks. Even though it required a plenty of usage in net pack it saved much time to themselves. To conclude, rather than having several disadvantages online, I strongly believe that advantages outweighs the most of it. The business might encounter some losses but it improved the excitement and integrity to work effectively.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
is such a platform that not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provides an opportunity for customers to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
their belongings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
is a wide field of
The plural noun “opportunities” cannot be used with the article “an”.
an employment opportunities
. Anyway due to the circumstances that couldn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
in person, the advancement in technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
them on a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Is this the personal pronoun “I”? It is spelled uppercase.
i
am going to explore my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
standpoints in the statement.

With the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
recent advancement in technologies, it obtained new kinds of application which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in connecting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
such as Skype, Zoom meetings, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Possible agreement error. The noun solicitation seems to be countable; consider using: “many other solicitations”.
many other solicitation
that
simply
supports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
especially
far away from each other or in an occurrence of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
undeniable circumstances.
For instance
the pandemic of COVID-19 actually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
our livelihood unlike the life once we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, the major example could be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of lockdown which has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
impact on the daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around the globe
specifically
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
industry leading to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean the noun “extent”?
extend
loss.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
the internet played an immense role in keeping the employers intact and active being able to work online from home despite in the fellowship or unity, it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
them to operate
profoundly
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
to be honest,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
meetings and trainings online did not affect in any sort of complications in fact
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
a chance to carry on with their
It appears that two hyphens are missing.
day to day
tasks.
“Even though” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Even though
it required a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of usage in net pack it saved much time to themselves.

To conclude
,
rather
than having several disadvantages online, I
strongly
believe that advantages outweighs the most of it. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
might encounter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
losses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
the excitement and integrity to work
effectively
.
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IELTS essay This days, more and more meetings and business trainings are taking online. Do the advantages of this change outweigh the disadvantages.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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