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Things that I love the most

Things that I love the most 6mwRK
The world is full of many wonderful and lovely things. So, when there are many beautiful and lovely things, it becomes very difficult to choose only one thing. Nevertheless, I have selected things that I love the most. First of all, I have a great love for my family. After all, the most important thing for a person is his family and the person is really happy when everything is good in his family. What I want most is this good and bright future where I happily live with my family. So I try to get high education to work in high-paying jobs. Secondly, I am very much interested in modern technologies. Amazing things and phenomena surround us. Science has conceived a lot of interesting and useful things that make life easier for mankind. But above all, I want to use it wisely and understand the real benefits of modern technology. To conclude, these things I have selected are dearest to me and are the essence of my life.
The world is full of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
wonderful and lovely things.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, when there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and lovely things, it becomes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to choose
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one thing.
Nevertheless
, I have selected things that I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
the most.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, I have a great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
for my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
After all
, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing for a person is his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and the person is
really
happy when everything is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
in his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. What I want most is this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and bright future where I
happily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
high education to work in high-paying jobs.

Secondly
, I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much interested in modern technologies. Amazing things and phenomena surround us. Science has conceived
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
interesting and useful things that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
life easier for mankind.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
above all
, I want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it
wisely
and understand the real benefits of modern technology.

To conclude
, these things I have selected are dearest to me and are the essence of my life.
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IELTS essay Things that I love the most

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
169 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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