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There is an assumption that children in wealthy families aren’t used to challenges in the real life and always struggle to solve problems in the future.

There is an assumption that children in wealthy families aren’t used to challenges in the real life and always struggle to solve problems in the future. 66Vlj
There is an assumption that children in wealthy families aren’t used to challenges in the real life and always struggle to solve problems in the future. However, it is not necessarily true as they are provided with better facilities, education and career opportunities. This essay will discuss whether ones who were brought up by poor or wealthy circumstances better face adult’s life troubles. To begin with, poor children support their parents quite more, so they get duties from the early age. That is crucial for adult’s life. Being used to manage yourself from the childhood you can easily make plans, wake up early and never be late. Even if this person got struggled with some life problem, he could with no doubt tackle it. Furthermore, poor children have higher desirability for money than wealthy ones. For example, football and basketball players in poor conditions motivated themselves from day to day in order to get better life. Motivation is indispensably for dealing with troubles, while laziness will destroy everything. However, children who were raised by wealthy families have greater opportunities to get better education. This leads to that they learn how to overcome obstacles. From the school due to the grading system, they are motivated to achieve something which will help those children to be successful in the future. Taking into consideration all mentioning above, children from less wealthy families have higher motivation and get used to responsibilities. These help them to deal with problems. In the same way ones that have richer families are qualitatively educated which guarantees them a stable career. I believe that mostly this doesn’t depend on circumstances you were brought up but it depends on how significantly you are motivated to be better from day to day.
There is an assumption that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
aren’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to challenges in the real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and always struggle to solve problems in the future.
However
, it is not
necessarily
true as they
are provided
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
facilities, education and career opportunities. This essay will discuss whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
who
were brought
up by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wealthy
circumstances
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
face adult’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
troubles.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
support their parents quite more,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
duties from the early age.
That is
crucial for adult’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to manage yourself from the childhood you can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
plans, wake up early and never be late. Even if this person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
struggled with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
problem, he could with no doubt tackle it.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have higher desirability for money than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
.
For example
, football and basketball players in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
conditions motivated themselves from day to day in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Motivation is
indispensably
for dealing with troubles, while laziness will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
everything.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who
were raised
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
have greater opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
education. This leads to that they learn how to overcome obstacles. From the school due to the grading system, they
are motivated
to achieve something which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to be successful in the future.

Taking into consideration all mentioning above,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
from less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
have higher motivation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to responsibilities. These
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to deal with problems.
In the same way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
that have richer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
are
qualitatively
educated which guarantees them a stable career. I believe that
mostly
this doesn’t depend on circumstances you
were brought
up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it depends on how
significantly
you
are motivated
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
from day to day.
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IELTS essay There is an assumption that children in wealthy families aren’t used to challenges in the real life and always struggle to solve problems in the future.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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