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There are more new towns nowadays, it is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for individuals to send their time free time. To what extent do to agree or disagree?

There are more new towns nowadays, it is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for individuals to send their time free time. q7e5
In modern era, it is pivotal that adding public parks, gardens, sports ground instead of shopping malls for people to spend their leisure time. I completely agree with this phenomenon. I shall discuss the importance of local parks and sports in people life There are number of reasons regarding the importance of gardens and sports stadium in free time of person, to begin with, health issue is a main problem behind young and old people such as obesity, depression and isolation. As a result, people should do regular exercise in stadium or parks and even they can learn teamwork by playing team games like football, cricket. Nowadays, teamwork skills are very useful in companies or other sectors too. Moreover, people can interact or communicate with each other. It develop to strengthen the fabric of society. What is more, denizens can live in lap of nature in parks and they can learn the importance of protecting the trees. There are same disadvantage of shopping center. First, people generally need clam or peace in their free time but due to the crowd in malls, they do not get harmony. Apart from that, shopping malls do not have sitting arrangement for old once, so old generation do not like malls. i believe that city dwellers should time with nature to need clam. To encapsulate, people should include parks, gardens and sports activity on their leisure time compere to utilizing time in malls
In modern era, it is pivotal that adding public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
, gardens,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
ground
instead
of shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to spend their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this phenomenon. I shall discuss the importance of local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
life


There are number of reasons regarding the importance of gardens and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
stadium in free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
of person, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, health issue is a main problem behind young and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
such as obesity, depression and isolation.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should do regular exercise in stadium or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
and even they can learn teamwork by playing team games like football, cricket. Nowadays, teamwork
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
or other sectors too.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can interact or communicate with each other. It
Did you mean "develops"?
develop
to strengthen the fabric of society.
What is more
, denizens can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in lap of nature in
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
parks and
they can learn the importance of protecting the trees.

There are same disadvantage of shopping center.
First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
generally
need clam or peace in their free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
due to the crowd in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
, they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
harmony. Apart from that, shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
do not have sitting arrangement for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
once,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
generation do not like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
.
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that city dwellers should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with nature to need clam.

To encapsulate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should include
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
, gardens and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
activity on their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
Did you mean the verb "compare" or the noun "compère" (master of ceremonies)?
compere
to utilizing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
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IELTS essay There are more new towns nowadays, it is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for individuals to send their time free time.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
238 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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