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The use of social media has made significant contributions to the development of society. Do you agree with this ide

The use of social media has made significant contributions to the development of society. Do you agree with this ide mb8NN
The application of social media has made vital improvement to the development of the community. In my opinion, I completely agree with this idea. Firstly, using social media help people to connect with the others. To begin with, in the past, people wanted to access know daily news, they must buy a newspaper to have more information but nowadays, social media can update information very quickly for people. Besides, people can video call and text other people through social media networks, namely Facebook, Instagram instead of meeting face to face, especially during the pandemic of covid-19. Moreover, people living away from home can keep in contact with their family and friends regardless of different geographical locations. For example, overseas study students can keep in touch with their loved ones to feel less lonely. Secondly, people can study through social media. Apparently, students can search the information about the lesson very quickly through the internet. Moreover they can self-study and connect with many students in the world. Besides, many discussion groups for students are frequently happening on social networking websites through live streaming services such as Facebook. In addition, students can study online through Zoom, Microsoft Team when they cannot go to school. It is very essential for students because they can keep up with knowledge. In conclusion, the use of social media contributes to the development of society. From my perspective, I think social media is a very useful tool to connect with other people and study on the Internet.
The application of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has made vital improvement to the development of the community. In my opinion, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

Firstly
, using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to connect with the others. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, in the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
wanted to access know daily news, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a newspaper to have more information
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
can update information
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Besides
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can video call and text other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
networks,
namely
Facebook, Instagram
instead
of meeting face to face,
especially
during the pandemic of
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid-19
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living away from home can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in contact with their family and friends regardless of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
geographical locations.
For example
, overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
ones to feel less lonely.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
.
Apparently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can search the information about the lesson
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the internet.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
they can self-study and connect with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in the world.
Besides
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
discussion groups for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
frequently
happening on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking websites
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
live streaming
services such as Facebook.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
Zoom, Microsoft Team when they cannot go to school. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with knowledge.

In conclusion
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
contributes to the development of society. From my perspective, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful tool to connect with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
on the Internet.
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IELTS essay The use of social media has made significant contributions to the development of society. Do you agree with this ide

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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