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The use of mobile phone is an anti social as smoking smoking is a pen in certain places and so mobile Kaun should also be banned do you agree or disagree

The use of mobile phone is an anti social as smoking smoking is a pen in certain places and so mobile Kaun should also be banned mYeq
It is disputable fact that Technology brought significant changes to our lives within a short period of time according to one school of thought these days uses of mobile phone is anti social CMS smoking going to these uses of it ought to be Ban however I completely disagree with this phenomenon and there are a number of arguments surrounded with my own opinion advocates of using mobile has lots of benefits primary it can be used in an emergency situation on account of these any faults can obtain relief for an instance in a time where authority battery instructions in order to defeat a chronic disease via electronic gadgets for saving the life of false as an outcome on account of the following their wall guidelines no any major impact has been found which can lead to able the mortality rate adding more heat to eat smart phones can lead to associate the world while commerce which has both positive points in order to diminish the joblessness figure Apple illustration where it's fun branch is also located in China oven to this Global partnership can be a mail your at as well as individuals of China Nation should be able to earn money as a result Apple company would be able to manufacture there wall outlets in order lower wages and Chinese Fox can easily employee feet can which can lead to Olivia Olivia the economy of nation talking another crucial prospective on this matter their education can be easily obtain in power plus is my help of electronic gadgets which can lead to sell the valuable time rustic area for cancer in any trouble padega can easily import the inside to the learners by means of internet amenities which cost is it does people should be completed to populate there cognizance level in the suitable places which could be note consume time for transportation by way of conclusion I once again 3 happy my position that it is impossible to run the any stats operation without using of mobile phones which has potential to escalate the economic of Nations and literature at and so on
It is disputable fact that Technology brought significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
to our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
within a short period of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
according to one school of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
these days
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
of mobile phone is
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
anti social
CMS smoking going to these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
of it ought to be Ban
however
I completely disagree with this phenomenon and there are a number of arguments surrounded with my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinion advocates of using mobile has lots of benefits primary it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in an emergency situation on account of these any faults can obtain relief for an instance in a
It is better to use 'time' with the time-relative pronoun 'when': "time when". (Alternatively, use 'in/on which')
time where
authority battery instructions in order to defeat a chronic disease via electronic gadgets for saving the life of false as an outcome on account of the following their wall guidelines
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
any major impact has
been found
which can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
Did you mean "to be able"?
to able
the mortality rate adding more heat to eat smart phones can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to associate the world while commerce which has both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
points in order to diminish the joblessness figure Apple illustration where it's fun branch is
also
located in China oven to this Global partnership can be a mail your at
Probable usage error. Use "and" after 'both'.
as well as
individuals of China Nation should be able to earn money
as a result
Apple
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
would be able to manufacture there wall outlets in order lower wages and Chinese Fox can
easily
employee feet
Please check whether a verb is missing here.
can which
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to
Possible typo: you repeated a word
Olivia Olivia
the economy of nation talking another crucial prospective on this matter their education can be
easily
Consider using a past participle here: "obtained".
obtain
in power plus is my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of electronic gadgets which can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to sell the valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
rustic area for cancer in any trouble
Possible spelling mistake found.
padega
can
easily
import the inside to the learners by means of internet amenities which cost is it does
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should
be completed
to populate there cognizance level in the suitable places which could be note consume
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for transportation by way of conclusion I once again 3 happy my position that it is impossible to run the any
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "stats'" or "stat's"?
stats
operation without using of mobile phones which has potential to escalate the economic of Nations and literature at and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on
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IELTS essay The use of mobile phone is an anti social as smoking smoking is a pen in certain places and so mobile Kaun should also be banned

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
356 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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