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The social security provisions of Britain entails that the government will have to pay for the care of old aged people living in old age homes

The social security provisions of Britain entails that the government will have to pay for the care of old aged people living in old age homes r8bek
The social security provisions of Britain entails that the government will have to pay for the care of old aged people living in old age homes, most of the times. The people living in such homes are the ones who have come to stay there on their own will or sometimes left there by their near and dear ones. In my opinion, the responsibility of bearing the cost of such arrangement for continuous care and nursing should be of the children and not the government. Only in cases where the old aged person does not have someone to call his or her child, should be taken care of on government's exchequer. Every person wants to have a family with kids and a partner to go home to. People spend all their lives earning and making sure that they provide every necessity and comfort to their families, especially to their children. They supress and stifle their desires and wishes so that they can save for a secure future for themselves as well as their children. When children grow up, their demands increase with age and parents make sure that they are fulfilled as much as possible within the financial constraints present at that moment. All this changes in quite a lot of cases when the parents get old and it is time for the children to step up and take care of them. At this point, in quite a lot of cases, the children shrug off their responsibilities and leave their parents to the mercy of government aid and care of a nurse. This is the time when the government should step in, backed with stringent laws, so that the children should bear all the cost for the care and facilities provided to their parents in old age homes. To conclude, I would like to reiterate my stand, that it must be the family which should be made to cover the expenses of old age care rather than government. No family should be allowed to dodge their responsibilities towards an old person or the parents when they reach the final stage of their lives. They must pay their dues.
The social security provisions of Britain entails that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
aged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
homes,
Consider using "most of the time" if you mean "usually" or "very often".
most of the times
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living in such homes are the
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ones
who have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to stay there on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
will or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
there by their near and dear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
. In my opinion, the responsibility of bearing the cost of such arrangement for continuous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and nursing should be of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and not the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
in cases where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
aged person does not have someone to call
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
child, should
be taken
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
's exchequer.

Every person wants to have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
with kids and a partner to go home to.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
spend all their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
earning and making sure that they provide every necessity and comfort to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
,
especially
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. They
Possible spelling mistake found.
supress
and stifle their desires and wishes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can save for a secure future for themselves
as well
as their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
grow up, their demands increase with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
and
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parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure that they
are fulfilled
as much as possible within the financial constraints present at that moment. All this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
cases when the
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parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
and it is time for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to step up and take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of them.

At this point, in quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
cases, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
shrug off their responsibilities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to the mercy of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
aid and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of a nurse. This is the time when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should step in, backed with stringent laws,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should bear all the cost for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and facilities provided to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
homes.

To conclude
, I would like to reiterate my stand, that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
which should
be made
to cover the expenses of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. No
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to dodge their responsibilities towards an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
person or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
when they reach the final stage of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
pay their dues.
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IELTS essay The social security provisions of Britain entails that the government will have to pay for the care of old aged people living in old age homes

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
358 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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