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The proliferation of private cars on the roads in many parts of the world has led to serious problems of pollution and may contribute to global warming.

The number of private cars today increases significantly, and this can cause pollution everywhere which contributes to global warming. As such, many people recommended that governments should spend much money to improve the quality of public transportation for reducing pollution. However, others believe that it is better to allocate money for developing electric cars that may cause less pollution. Therefore, I personally argue that the government should spend money to develop better public transportation. To begin, evolving or producing electric cars does not provide the best solution to minimize air pollution around the world. First, this action will cause other problems because the government must invest more much money to produce electric cars. Furthermore, this way also is not effective and efficient to solve the problem since electric cars is not guarantee to protect pollution. This is as the cause of the pollution is not because of types of transportation including electric cars but due to how many people are using it. However, it is important for the government to spend a significant amount budget for improving the quality of public transportation. For instance, when government develops better public transportation system, automatically there is no doubt for people to use public transportation as much as safe. Thus, people can use public transportation for their activities. To sum up, it seems to me that the government should spend more money for the development of public transportation than producing electric cars to reduce air pollution around the world. It is imperative that the government should keep control of the use of public transportation and make a good allocation for this action.
The number of private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
increases
significantly
, and this can
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cause
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pollution
everywhere which contributes to global warming. As such,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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people
recommended that
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governments
should
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spend
much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the quality of
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public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
for reducing
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pollution
.
However
, others believe that it is better to allocate
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money
for developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
that may
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cause
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
.
Therefore
, I
personally
argue that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to develop better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, evolving or producing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
does not provide the best solution to minimize air
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pollution
around the world.
First
, this action will
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cause
other problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
invest more much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
.
Furthermore
, this way
also
is not effective and efficient to solve the problem since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
is not guarantee to protect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
. This is as the
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cause
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of types of
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transportation
including
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electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
due to how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are using it.

However
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
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government
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
a significant amount budget for improving the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
.
For instance
, when
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government
develops better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
system,
automatically
there is no
The usual collocation for “doubt” is “in” or “about”, not “people”. Did you mean “doubt in” or “doubt about”?
doubt for
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people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
as much as safe.
Thus
,
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people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
for their activities.

To sum up, it seems to me that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
than producing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
around the world. It is imperative that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
control of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
allocation for this action.
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IELTS essay The proliferation of private cars on the roads in many parts of the world has led to serious problems of pollution and may contribute to global warming.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
269 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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