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The president of Grove College has recommended that the college abandon its century old tradition of all female education and begin admitting men Pointing to other all female colleges that experienced an increase in applications after adopting coeducation

The president of Grove College has recommended that the college abandon its century old tradition of all female education and begin admitting men Pointing to other all female colleges that experienced an increase in applications after adopting coeducation r8kLl
The president of Grove College said that they should start admitting men because it can bring more enrollment and applications. However, the director of the alumnae claims that it is essential to preserve the traditional of all female education. Both of them should answer the question below to make their assert more convincing. First, the president states that the other all-female colleges that experienced an increased enrollment after they adopting coeducation. We need to ask, which college is the other all-female colleges? For example, if the other all-female college which start admitting the man is a royal school before. They only permit those girls who has the royal background to enroll in school. Now, they start to accept the normal background students and male to study in their college. It is normal that the number of enrollments increased. But It can not prove that the increase of the enrollment is because of the coeducation. There might probably is because the female students who have the normal background get into the college. Second, the director of the alumnae cites annual surveys of incoming students to indicate the all-female status was the primary reason for them to select Grove. However, what is the other students in Grove and the all faculty opinions of the coeducation? The incoming students could not represent all the voice of the Grove. If all the students and faculty agree to have the coeducation, because students need to learn how to get along with man, or even they eager to have a relation with man during their youth. The director of the alumnae should launch a questionnaire include all the students, faculty and incoming students to make sure all the advice and perspective have considered. Last, the director of the alumnae also points to a survey of Grove alumnae which have a majority of respondents to keep the college all female. What is the exactly number of the “majority” respondents? For example, there are one hundred of the alumnae, only 30 people have responded to the survey and 29 of them wants to preserve the tradition of Grove. Indeed, if is a majority of the 30 people who has reply to the survey. It is so inaccurate to say lots of people in alumnae want to keep the college all female, because there are still half of the alumnae don’t have respond their thoughts. The president and the director both have to answer questions mentioned above to strengthen their claims.
The president of Grove College said that they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
admitting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can bring more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enrollment
and applications.
However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
director
of the alumnae claims that it is essential to preserve
The phrase 'the traditional of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'the' and 'of'.
the traditional of
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
education. Both of them should answer the question below to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their assert more convincing.

First
, the president states that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
all-female colleges that experienced an increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enrollment
after
Did you mean "they're adopting", "they are adopting", or "they were adopting"?
they adopting
coeducation. We need to ask
If " which" starts an indirect question, you do not need to put a comma before it.
, which
college is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
all-female colleges?
For example
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
all-female college which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
admitting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
is a royal school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
permit those girls who
Did you mean "have", "haven"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'girls' should be used.
has
the royal background to enroll in school.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to accept the normal background
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and male to study in their college. It is normal that the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enrollments
increased.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
It can not prove that the increase of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enrollment
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the coeducation. There might
probably
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who have the normal background
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
into the college.

Second, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
director
of the alumnae cites annual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
surveys
of incoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to indicate the all-female status was the primary reason for them to select Grove.
However
, what is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in Grove and the all faculty opinions of the coeducation? The incoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
could not represent all the voice of the Grove. If all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and faculty
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to have the coeducation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
need to learn how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
along with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
, or even they eager to have a relation with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
during their youth. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
director
of the alumnae should launch a questionnaire include all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, faculty and incoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure all the advice and perspective have considered.

Last, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
director
of the alumnae
also
points to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
survey
of Grove alumnae which have a majority of respondents to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the college all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
. What is the exactly number of the “majority” respondents?
For example
, there are one hundred of the alumnae,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
30
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have responded to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
survey
and 29 of them wants to preserve the tradition of Grove.
Indeed
, if is a majority of the 30
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
reply to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
survey
. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
inaccurate to say lots of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in alumnae want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the college all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
still
half of the alumnae don’t have
Use past participle here: "responded".
respond
their thoughts.

The president and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
director
both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
answer questions mentioned above to strengthen their claims.
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IELTS essay The president of Grove College has recommended that the college abandon its century old tradition of all female education and begin admitting men Pointing to other all female colleges that experienced an increase in applications after adopting coeducation

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
412 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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